


Midnight

by Dream_nootInnit



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Banter, Derealization, Dreaming, Fluff, Healing, Hospitalization, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Music, Muteness, Nightmare, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Sexual Abuse, Rape Recovery, Real Life, Self Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Trauma, car crash, slowburn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-16 19:14:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 14
Words: 32,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29829615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dream_nootInnit/pseuds/Dream_nootInnit
Summary: Plagued by dark thoughts of a night long since passed, Dream falls deeper into a pit of despair. In his dreams, he sees images of that night and he sees images of wishful moments. Everything must wake eventually. And there is no guarantee if the conscious realm is nicer than the midnight realm. Dream only has one fact to hold onto: he is not alone.-----------------------Dream slows to a stop, panting. He’s prepared to keep running, but thankful for the break.Suddenly, a warm hand touches his shoulder and his body switches into defensive mode. He passes his axe into his left hand before reaching up with his right to grasp the arm. In one Swift motion, the unknown person is flung straight into a tree and lands with an axe at their throat.“Wait!!” A familiar voice cries.“George??” Dream gasps, lowering the axe. “What, what's going on?”“You’re safe!” George struggles to speak through his spike of fear. “you're safe.”
Relationships: Dream/GeorgeNotFound
Comments: 29
Kudos: 107





	1. Nightmare

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [I Didn't Think I Could Be Made Smaller (DreamNotFound)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27667850) by [arsenicarose](https://archiveofourown.org/users/arsenicarose/pseuds/arsenicarose). 



> Hello there! I would like to start this off with a few disclaimers!
> 
> MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING!! This work touches on some very heavy topics, so PLEASE read the tags!
> 
> This is my final draft of this story! The original, mostly unedited, version can be found on my profile.
> 
> Halfway through writing this, the drama about Dream's ex-girlfriend came up. The ex-girlfriend in this story is in NO WAY related to Dream's IRL ex. That being said, all of these characters are mostly treated as OCs. As I wrote this story, it seemed like they were becoming their own characters with their own personalities. So please do not assume I am writing about Clay and George, this is a story about Dream and Georgenotfound. 
> 
> Since this is a very angsty plot, I would like to say I hope this NEVER happens to anyone, especially the content creators featured in this story. Any background stories I tell are fictional as well. If a content creator involved in this story wishes for me to take this down, I will gladly do so.
> 
> \-----------------------
> 
> Story information:
> 
> Anything in Italics are thoughts, messages, or lyrics (Italics and quotation marks). Bolded words are written. "----------" indicate timeskips, flashbacks, or changes in scene. This whole story is written in third person Dream's pov.
> 
> This story is loosely based off Midnight by Aleeso and Lost Boy by Troye Sivan. 
> 
> COVID-19 is not a thing in this universe either.

Chapter specific note: Nightmare comes from a really neat [fanart](https://twitter.com/omin_bg/status/1318310600590635011) of Dream’s alter ego by OminBG on Twitter.

\-----------------------

Dream sighs as he raises his head from his desk, eyes blinking sleepily as they adjust to the computer screen in front of him. He's been coding for nearly three hours now, trying to get it just right. It doesn’t seem to be working though. Such a simple design but nearly impossible for him to complete with how scatterbrained he’s been lately. 

_I need to do something other than work today._

He groans as he rises from his chair. His joints crack with the effort, relieving built up stress. 

Patches meows from the bed as she watches her owner stand for the first time all evening. 

"Hey girl," he smiles, moving to the bed. "How are you doing?"

With just a few movements of his hand, she's already laying back down, purring. She’s so content and relaxed, ignorant to her owner’s mental exhaustion.

"Yeah I bet you've had a chill day so far," he chuckles. "Come on, let's grab some dinner."

He heads into the kitchen with Patches on his heels. First, he grabs the cat food to take care of the sweet feline. Then, he picks up his phone from the counter and checks Discord. Only George and Sapnap messaged him in the time between streaming and coding it seems.

**S: Dreeeeeeeeeeeaaaammmmmmmmmmmm wanna play bedwars**

_G: Dreeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmm we're borrreeeeddddd_

**S: Come on Dreeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmm**

**S: He's ignoring us *pout emoji***

Currently, the British and Texan boys are in a voice call, so Dream decides to join them.

"Morning sleepyhead," Sapnap jokes.

"Oh hush, I've been coding all afternoon." Dream rolls his eyes as he sets the phone to the speaker setting. "I had an idea but now I'm just kind of getting distracted from it." He places the phone down on the counter to find something to eat.

"You good?" George asks, concerned about Dream's choice of words.

"Yeah, I'm probably just tired from the stream too. I mean speedrunning for six hours isn't exactly easy." He lies, the real reason sitting right on his tongue.

"But you're big man Dream," Sapnap laughs. "You should get energized from speedrunning!"

"And you're just a child whose bedtime has already passed!" Dream retorts with a forced laugh. "Anyways, it's like 11 here, George. You sound way too awake for 5 am."

"Well considering my sleep schedule I'm mostly nocturnal," George agrees with Dream. "My best friends live in America, six hours behind my clock. I work at home, so I set my sleep schedule cause I'm a big boy."

"Sure you are mister 5'9." Sapnap chuckles. 

Dream shakes his head slightly with a snicker as he prepares a batch of pizza rolls. Nothing like a midnight pizza roll party.

"I'm gonna head to bed, I pulled an all nighter yesterday," Sapnap says with a yawn. "I don't wanna go to bed and leave you two hanging but I'm already in bed and tired."

"Are your bunny slippers warm?" Dream teases.

"Actually they're corgi socks, and yes they are very warm," Sapnap responds with a heavy, exaggerated pout. 

"Alright then, gnight Sappitus Nappitus," George laughs suddenly, causing Dream to stub his toe on the counter out of shock.

"FUCK!" Dream shouts in pain, waving his hurt foot in the air.

"What just happened?" Sapnap asks, holding back a laugh.

"I stubbed my toe on the cabinet," Dream hisses. 

"Minecraft, but every time I take damage my toe gets stubbed," George muses. 

"Go take care of your boo boo I'm going to bed," Sapnap yawns before hanging up, leaving Dream and George on the vc.

"So this plug-in you're coding, what's it about?" George asks. "I could help if it's causing you this much exhaustion."

"I saw a comment that suggested replacing every sound with a The Bee Movie script that layers over itself to sound chaotic,” Dream explains as he takes out the pizza rolls. "Seemed easy, but I also tried to make a mini AI that defines which line it spits out."

"Wow, that'd be a great plugin!" George responds, voice lighting up at the idea. "How did you think of that?"

"It’s like that plugin Fundy did where he layered the sounds over each other on a slight delay. But I started it and now I’m getting distracted. My mind is moving too fast for me to keep up.”

“I’m sure you can do it, you just need a break.”

“Thanks George,” the blond smiles even though George can’t see his face. Then, he’s shocked out of his grin by his phone. “Shoot, I’ll be right back, my Mom’s calling.”

“What’s up?” He asks cautiously, knowing she does not call often.

“Oh hey Clay, is it okay if Drista comes over? I need to go to a business event with your father but it’s out of town, so we’ll be gone all night.”

“Of course, when are you bringing her over?”

“Does tomorrow at noon work?”

“Yeah, but why didn’t you just call in the morning? You’re not usually up this late?”

“I know how your sleep schedule is, Clay. I raised you.”

“Good point,” Dream faintly chuckles. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow then, good night.”

“Good night Clay, and make sure you’re taking care of yourself. You sound tired.” His mom gently urges. 

“I will, don't worry,” he nods, slightly rolling his eyes as he hangs up. 

His thumb hovers over George’s contact for a moment as he recollects his emotions. 

“Everything goin good with your mom?” George asks. 

“Yeah, Drista’s coming over tomorrow. May have a special guest on stream.” 

“You think Tommy’s gonna stream tomorrow?”

“Yeah, pretty sure tomorrow is Tuesday. Drista would kill Tommy 1000%.” Dream laughs as he imagines his sassy sister with a sword in hand. 

George snickers lightly before he’s overtaken by a yawn. 

“Sounds like someone needs to sleep,” Dream teases. 

“Yeah I need to sleep, but so do you,” he points out. 

“Yeah I'm getting old I can't even stay up past midnight.”

“Pffft old?!” George sputters (the exact reaction Dream was aiming for) “you turned 21 last month!”

“G’night Georgie,” Dream laughs.

“Night Dreeeeam,” George responds, extending his friend’s name. 

They hang up and Dream sighs, not sure what's happening with him. He takes out the pizza rolls before sitting at the bar to eat them. 

_What's going on today? Why do I feel so off?_

That thought plagues him as he finishes his food and heads into the bathroom. A quick five minutes go by and he collapses into bed. 

A tinge of fear lingers in his mind as he slips into unconsciousness. It’ll be fine tonight. Surely.

_Inhale_

_Exhale_

_Inhale_

_Exhale_

_Inhale_

He opens his eyes and groans as he recognizes his surroundings. He can't see well, like he's looking through a thick sheet of plastic thanks to the mask strapped to his face. This is the third time this week. Like clockwork, he reaches into his knapsack and pulls out an iron axe and shield. Then he grabs the armor and a few health potions. How those items fit in the small leather bag, he has no idea. All he knows is he only has minutes to get out. 

The scene looks the same as always: foggy, dark, lit by moonlight and flickering lanterns. He's surrounded by three stone statues, each with carvings. They represent some ethereal figure, but none that Dream can recognize. All he knows is the source of his nightmares emerge from them.

“Ohhhhh Clay,” a sickly voice weaves through his mind. “Don’t you know better?”

His heart rate races as he takes off in a sprint, leaping over a fallen log. The ground shakes as a hunter demon emerges from their statue. He named himself Nightmare the first time Dream had this night terror. Dream uses his axe’s reflection in the moonlight to look behind him, and he sees Nightmare.

“The fact that you still want to try-.”

Dream knows this scenario. He’s had this dream or glimpses of it all week, and can't seem to get rid of this demon. He's nothing but prey in this dreamscape at the mercy of the hunter. It would be so much easier to succumb to the fear, but Dream has no control over his actions. Everything that happens leaves Dream in the backseat; a passerby trapped in a VR headset if you will. 

“In this realm you are defenseless.”

His foot is caught by a vine and he falls, but some form of luck spares him and Dream rolls back onto his feet to run. Brambles and sticks tear into his skin, but he has no choice but to continue running. That's all he can do, after all.

Nightmare catches Dream’s shoulder, pulling him back, as he snarls “I CONTROL YOU CLAY!”

It seems this fight is between Nightmare and Dream. A pity for Dream, considering how Nightmare’s diamond scythe swings down and pierces the shield. Dream shoves him away, losing the protection. With a powerful swing of his axe, he cuts a large gash into Nightmare's neck but he knows it won't stop the demon. He pivots on his heel and keeps running. 

In the distance, he sees light bursting through the trees. It seems like a trap but Dream has no control and ends up at the edge of the grove. As his foot passes over the first root, he hears Nightmare wail a horrible noise. He risks a glance to see Nightmare is gone. The forest is silent. 

Dream slows to a stop, panting. He’s prepared to keep running, but thankful for the break. A warm feeling rushes through his limbs, and he notices he has control of his body.

Suddenly, a warm hand touches his shoulder and his body switches into defensive mode. He passes his axe into his left hand before reaching up with his right to grasp the arm. In one swift motion, the unknown person is flung straight into a tree and lands with an axe at their throat. 

“WAIT!!” A familiar voice cries. 

“George??” Dream gasps, lowering the axe. “What, what's going on?”

“You’re safe!” George struggles to speak through his spike of fear. “you're safe.”

Dream lowers his axe, regret piercing his heart. George looks normal, but this time he has a black shirt on instead of his normal blue hoodie. His eyes glow an unnatural amber color as well, almost like headlamps in the dark forest. 

“I'm never safe, this is just an illusion. Nightmare is right behind me. I have to go,” Dream rambles before turning around. 

As his foot moves forward, George grabs his hand. His soft hand keeps Dream still. 

“This isn't an illusion,” He whispers. 

Dream notices the way George’s hand feels and squeezes it. He feels warm. Tangible. Real. A gentle hand cups his jaw, shocking him out of his realization. 

“What's going on George,” Dream murmurs, trying his best to think of a reason this is happening. His head slowly tilts into the touch, his eyes fluttering closed. His soft hand grounds Dream, enveloping him in a feeling of safety.

“You're safe,”

The hand moves away from his chin and then suddenly both of his hands are being held. The touch calms him in a way nothing else ever could. Dream refuses to raise his head though, because he knows this can't be real. If he looks up, it’ll break the illusion and he’ll be devastated.

“I need to go, he’ll be here any minute.”

“He’s not coming,” George insists. 

“How do you know that?” His voice cracks, his eyes on the verge of tears. This is such a nice feeling, such a change from his nights of terror. 

Through all of this, though, he knows his fate. 

“Do you trust me?” George asks. 

“Of,” he chokes on his words as the first tear falls. “Course.”

George moves Dream’s hands to rest on his hips before letting go. Dream still keeps his eyes cast to their shoes, noticing the mud and grime staining his own in comparison to George’s clean sneakers. Then, a satin ribbon brushes against his ear. The tight band around his head loosens and the mask that has blinded Dream for weeks drops to the ground. Light floods his pupils and he looks around, no longer in the haunted forest. 

“George,” he hiccups, looking down at the shorter man. 

“Now do you believe me?”

“I-” Dream stutters.

George’s right hand moves up Dreams arm lightly, causing shivers to run down his skin. His hand finally rests at the nape of Dream’s neck as he takes a single step forward. 

“What is it going to take for you to trust me?”

“I trust you, George.” Dream whispers. “but I'm scared.”

“Of what?” George's voice is much quieter than it was before, causing Dream to feel something new.

“Nightmare.”

“He’s gone,” George assures, his face now inches away from Dream. 

“But wh-” he starts to protest but is promptly stopped by a pair of warm lips.

It's only a peck, but it’s enough to get Dream’s attention. His face is overrun with a warm blush, his hands now a little tighter on George’s hips. His heart stirs with a new fuel rather than fear. 

Hungry for more, Dream leans back down and captures George’s lips. He’s more insistent this time, more sure of himself. He no longer feels scared, only safe. His hand moves up to George’s hair, pulling him closer. A fire burns in his stomach, lit by the sweet taste of chocolate. Why chocolate? Dream couldn’t tell ya. All he knows is he feels _infinite._

George’s hands slide down to Dream’s shoulders, then slowly drift down. His light fingers dance across the tender skin on Dream’s chest, sending shivers through the latter’s body. Dream bites George’s lip slightly, not thinking about how he’s kissing his best friend.

This feels so wrong but right. A different type of fear bursts into his chest, but George drowns that feeling out. Their bodies thud against a tree, George now being lifted off the ground. They separate to catch their breath, their minds buzzing with emotion. 

“You should stop worrying, Clay.” George smiles. “I’m right here.”

Dream’s heart drops at that statement. A cold wave of emotion slaps him in the face. 

“Fuck. Fuck. FUCK!!” He screams, punching George into the tree. “I KNEW IT!”

Blood splatters his fist as George coughs. 

“Clay! Stop!” his voice is different this time. It sounds like… Her. 

“NO! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!” He sobs, tugging at his own hair in panic as George struggles to stand, his eyes glowing a demonic red. 

Tears flow freely once more as Dream slams George into the ground before running for his life. The light is gone, the shadows are back. 

“FUCK!” Dream cries as he runs into the night. 

Ghostly traces of the kiss linger, but this time, they don’t bring anything good. 

The ground slips away from beneath his feet and suddenly, his breath is knocked out of him as he lands on a mattress. 

He opens his eyes to see the fan whirring above him in the dark room. A meow shocks him out of his stupor and he turns to see Patches sitting on the pillow next to his. A tear once more falls down his face, but this time, it’s more real than anything else.


	2. Falling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since it's not the focus of the story, the DreamSMP timeline is not accurate whatsoever😅

He doesn’t go back to sleep. 

Instead he cuddles with Patches while he mulls over the odd dream. 

_The fear was familiar yet unwelcome. It felt stronger than usual too. Normally Nightmare wasn’t so… Forward. He liked to toy with me before making a move. Hell, the fact that my monsters have manifested into personas with names and thoughts is sick._

_The fight should not have happened like that._ Dream never gets away from Nightmare when they fight no matter what he tries. 

_And then there was George. Fuck, he looked so amazing in the moonlight. His eyes glowed, but that should have scared me off. He also never wears black._

_And… His lips. What the hell, why did I dream of that. Is it wrong that I want to go back? He's my best friend for crying out loud. And plus, I'm not ready for love yet, I don't know when I'll be._

“What do you think, Patches?” he murmurs as he softly pets his cat. “what do you think of the dream? I wonder what you're dreaming of, you snore.”

Having lived with no one but Patches for a while now, he talks to her a lot. She never understands, but sometimes she seems like she responds. This is not one of those times though. 

“I’ve always liked talking to him, but I thought that was just because we're friends. But friends don't dream about kissing them… Do they?”

He’s shaken out of his thoughts by a quiet meow. Patches stands up from his arms and stretches before meowing again. She proceeds to knead Dream’s arm until he sits up. 

“Okay okay girl,” he chuckles. “is that your way of telling me it's time for breakfast?”

**Mrewwww**

He rolls his neck, working out the soreness from laying down weird, before getting up. His nerves are still shot from the nightmare, so he decides to turn on music to fill the empty house. 

Spotify’s first recommendation is Hot Sugar; a classic. 

Patches is hot on his heels as he goes to open the food. She jumps on the barstool then onto the countertop and sits patiently by her bowl. 

“I really should make you wait on the floor,” Dream mutters before handing over the food bowl. 

The feline immediately starts to eat, ignoring everything around her. 

Dream checks his phone to see some notifications from the DreamSMP server. Mostly Wilbur and Schlatt talking. 

_W: would hot pockets solve alcoholism_

**S: depends on how much money you have**

_W: if I have like 100 pounds, how many hot pockets could I buy?_

**S: I'm not a British wanker idk how much a pound is**

_W: 100 pounds is $133_

**S: 133 hot pockets then**

_W: at least 60 hangover meals for 100 pounds? That sounds amazing_

He shakes his head in confusion at the conversation before contributing some advice

_D: don't trust American capitalism Wilbur_

He then switches over to the storyline channel to ask about who’s streaming what today. 

_D: what storyline streams are going today?_

**W: our next event is next week so I think we’re just working on any personal projects we have**

He sends a thumbs up emoji before clicking off Discord. 

It’s currently 10, so he’s got 2 hours until his sister arrives. The British guys are probably gonna stream around the time Drista comes over, so he decides to forgo playing on the SMP for the time being. 

“Want to be cute for Twitter?” He turns to Patches who is almost done eating. 

He runs a hand along her back, chuckling as she presses into his touch. Quickly, he takes a picture of her crouched on the counter while she’s distracted with the food. 

“Your catnip came in, I wonder how much you’ll like it,” he says. “Ready to see Drista again? She’ll be here in a few hours.”

She meows, looking at her now empty food bowl. Then, she turns and leaves Dream alone in the kitchen. 

“Cats, it's true what people say. They're like angsty teenagers.” He mutters to himself. 

He decides to sit down and plan out the next video idea: Minecraft manhunt with a time limit. He doesn't know what the title is going to be, but that usually comes later. 

\--------------------

Dream looks away from the computer to see Patches running into the room. The doorbell rang and she’s not a fan of that noise. 

“It’s okay Patches,” he scoops her up before heading to the door. 

It’s Drista. He swallows any thought of last week and puts on a smile.

“What’s up ya little twat?” Dream greets the person at the door. 

“Nothing much dweeb,” she retorts as she steps inside. 

“How’s it going? You feeling popular being related to the most popular YouTuber?” 

“If I got power from being related to someone who makes videos for 8 year olds I would give it up immediately.” She laughs. 

It’s cliche banter but they always do this. It’s a side effect of being from two different generations.

“You hungry? I was about to order some food.”

“Sure, what are you getting?” 

“Thinking bout some Asian food, maybe pad Thai or ramen?”

“Ramen sounds good.”

“Seafood ramen like normal?” He asks, grabbing his phone off the counter. 

“Yeah, thanks.”

“Here to say hi to Drista,” Dream sets Patches down on the couch where said human is sitting. 

Patches immediately sits on her lap, purring. 

“Thanks Patches, now we know who you love more.” Dream mumbles, feigning annoyance.

“I just adopted your cat Clay.”

He chuckles as he opens door dash. 

“The little rascal always loves you. Hey, the guys got some stuff going on today on the SMP, mind if you just hang out with Patches for like two hours?”

“That’s cool, go play your little nerd game.” she teases. 

“How long are you staying? Mom didn’t mention.”

“She said overnight and she’ll get me tomorrow at noon. Kind of bullshit that I couldn’t just stay at home though."

“You know how she is with the law. Someone under 16 can't be left alone for longer than blah blah blah.” He chuckles. “At least now you get to spend time with your super cool brother.”

“Super cool brother who can't cook for shit so he orders out every night and spends all day playing a game meant for 8 year olds.”

“You’re never gonna let down the fact that I play Minecraft for a living, are you?”

“Nope.”

“Fair. Ok food’s gonna be here in twenty minutes you mind getting it?”

“Sure thing.”

“Alright, you know how to work the tv, just keep all the porn off my history.”

She bursts out laughing as Dream retreats back into his room. 

His computer never got turned off from the night before, so it’s only a few clicks and he’s on discord and Minecraft. 

This time, though, he hesitates. His mouse hovers over the vc because he sees George is currently on. Why should that dream have changed anything? It was just a figment of his imagination. This is George, not whatever monster was in that dream. Georgenotfound, his best friend. _Friend_. 

On top of those conflicting thoughts, he shudders with the thought of being live. After the incident, he hadn’t left the house. He hasn’t stepped outside of his house, not even for groceries, since 10 days ago. Even that small trip to the store felt deadly. 

He takes a deep breath and joins call to hear Tommy and George arguing about something related to L’Manberg. 

“Shush GOGY! I’m the right hand man of L’manberg and there's nothing you can do to stop me from building my intimidation tower in front of your house because your house is right next to L’Manberg!”

“Ugh you’re such a child,” George scoffs. Dream can almost see him rolling his eyes, his smile growing with his tone. “Fine I guess I’ll build my house somewhere else. Chat, where do you think I should make it?”

George clicks off vc to go interact with his stream, leaving Tommy and Dream alone. 

“BIG MAN D HOW YA DOIN MY MAN?”

“Doin good child, what have you managed to fuck up on the server today?”

“Nothin much, just building a little something to intimidate the masses.”

“Oh boy, please don't make it out of cobblestone again.” Dream releases an exaggerated sigh, putting on his stream persona. 

“Would you rather me make it out of dicks?”

“Twitch TOS.”

"Good point big man TOS don't come for me I'm just a child.”

“So you admit it?”

“What wait wait wait no no no that’s not what I meant,” Tommy cackles. “Chat chat chat I'm not a child I'm a big man, I, agh.”

“Looks like they agree with me.” Dream chuffs, smiling. 

He leaves the community house to browse the server, looking at what everyone’s been doing. There are so many builds now, it can take ten minutes to get from one side of the server to another. And they're still expanding. 

He takes the Prime Path to check on Eret’s Tesco demolition, Bad and Skeppy’s quartz mansion, and Wilbur’s bird nest thing that is now flooded. 

All the while, he’s just trying to keep up with Tommy’s energy. It’s just George and Tommy streaming right now, but he would much rather talk to George after he takes more time thinking about that dream. Wilbur and Tubbo will probably start streaming soon, then Techno and Philza like to get on afterwards. 

As much as he enjoys playing Minecraft with Tommy, his mind is a whirlpool of “what if” and questions. He can’t focus. God, why does his mind keep going back to the kiss? That was a nightmare. 

“Dream, you there?” Tommy shocks him out of his thoughts. 

He looks up to see Tommy’s avatar staring at him, both seeming AFK. 

“Yeah I’m here, sorry my sister is here today,” he comes up with an excuse smoothly. “She just got some food I think.”

“What's your sister’s name?”

“That's confidential.”

“Probably something dumb like Drista. Dream’s sister.”

“Sure if that’s what you want to call her,” Dream chuckles.

“How old is your sister?”

“14, so don't say anything dumb Tommy.”

“I won't I won't.”

“You’re streaming right now right?”

“Yeah yeah,”

“She’s probably in the other room watching you. I can hear a very obnoxious cackle through my headphones.”

“Wait she watches me? Dream’s sister watches me?? Can I get some Pogs in the chat this is huge news!”

“Yeah, she's got twitch notifications set up on mom’s phone.”

He sputters before shouting, “Wait really?!”

“Yeah we were having lunch one time and my mom’s phone went “Tommyinnit is live.” I think you’re her favorite streamer or something.”

“What an honor! HELLO DRISTA!”

“Want me to get her on the call?” He suggests. 

“I uh sure?”

“I guess she can play too but I'll be supervising so don’t say anything too bad, Tommy.”

He stands up and mutes his mic before heading out of the room. 

“Hey Drista you done eating?”

“Yeah, why?” She looks up from the tv, which has Tommy’s stream going. 

“Wanna talk to Tommy?” he asks as the stream delay finally catches up. 

“HELLO DRISTA!” Tommy crows in screen, causing her to look at the tv in shock. 

“Wait really?” 

“Yeah come on. Stream’s waiting.”

She bounces off the couch and follows Dream into his room. 

He slides the headset onto his head and unmutes. 

“Alright I've got her here, uh I'm connecting earphones so I can hear.” He announces before handing the headset to Drista. 

He unplugs the headset for a moment to move around cables and connects a second pair of earphones as well. 

“Alright Drista’s on my account so don’t so anything stupid.”

“Who do you think I am Big Man?”

“A child is what you are,” Drista says, not missing a beat. 

“Oh hello Drista, i- you're younger than me??”

“Yeah but I'm glad I'm not a child.”

“Well I'm not either!”

"That's what a child would do.”

“Do you know how to play Minecraft?” Dream asks Drista. 

“Vaguely, can’t be that hard if children like Tommy can play it.”

“Hey!”

Then, Drista proceeds to hit Tommy. 

“Wait wait WAIT TOMMY STOP DRISTA GIVE ME THE HEADSET DRISTA HE’S GOING TO KILL ME!”

He wrestles the controls away from his sister before holeing his avatar up to heal. 

“Dream what happened did your balls just drop?”

“What?” 

“Your voice sounds so much deeper.”

“Huh?”

“Drista messed up the mic.”

“No I didn't, it just didn't like the fact that it’s speaking to a child.”

“Oh you are so glad you’re playing on Dream’s account.”

“Is that a threat?”

“Is the mic working?” Dream asks. 

“Yeah yeah you sound normal.”

“Alright I'm gonna go in the other room and eat but I'll be listening. Don't do any stupid shit.”

“Alright big man D.”

“Why do you call him Big Man D?” Drista asks, snickering. 

Dream shakes his head as he leaves the room, glad to have a distraction. He pulls the bowl of ramen sitting on the counter towards himself and sits down. It’s been a while since he’s eaten ramen so this is a nice change. In the other room, he can hear Drista putting Tommy in his place which is quite frankly hilarious. 

_I guess I can pull up George’s stream to see what he’s doing. I mean… It’s fine for us to watch each other’s streams right? Nothing to do with last night at all. God why am I still THINKING ABOUT THAT? I can’t, I can’t do that. Never. Not again._

He plugs in earphones to his phone before clicking over to the British stream. 

“Oh my God SAPNAP STOP!!!” George screams, face red. 

Dream almost chokes on his soup at the first thing he sees. 

George blushing a furious red with a sweater paw over his mouth. 

“I’m not red chat shut up, it’s just hot.”

Then, a media share goes through and Careless Whisper starts to play. 

“Oh my God Sapnap look what you did.” George throws himself back, shaking with laughter. 

His face is so beautiful when he blushes. Those lips too, they're pulled tight into a wide grin. His breathing says he’s not happy though, he’s thoroughly embarrassed. 

“What Georgie? You don't want to get in bed?”

“No Sapnap especially when the beds are sitting on CRAFTING TABLES!!!”

The person who shared Careless Whisper only had enough money for a twenty second clip, so the next one rolls in. It’s called Midnight. 

“Ok this is a nice song much better than the last one.” George comments. 

He must be doing a music only media share, which definitely gives his mods a break from the last time he did a media share stream. Whoever shared this song donated a lot of money; it’s the whole song. 

“ _Now I just wanna stay here and fall into midnight_ ”

George is in the middle of another laugh and Dream’s heart drops at that. The music and the smile George has makes his heart stop. 

_“Want nobody else now, only you feel right_ ”

His mind flashed back into the dream, but it’s before it turned back into a nightmare. The forest was light, the vines were glowing a soft yellow, and George. His face was gentle, his hands soft, his voice clear. 

“ _So stay til the morning, stay for a while”_

_Stay. Stay for a while._

He doesn't want to think about the nightmare but the pleasant part of the dream just constantly stays in his head. 

His lips. His cherry red lips. His breathing was shallow, he was nervous. But he felt so real. 

While all of this emotional turmoil is happening in his head, George is killing Sapnap. 

Then, another death message pops up. 

**Tommyinnit fell out of the world**

“DRISTA!!” He yells before jumping off his seat. 


	3. Whisper

“Did ya have fun killing Tommy?” Dream asks as Drista stands up. 

“Hell yeah.”

“So what do you want to do now?”

“I dunno, my friends wanted to get on call later and play some Among Us.”

“Well then go be a teenager and sit in your room all night on call with your friends you little whippersnapper,” Dream teases, ruffling her hair. “You’ve got the wifi password and I'm assuming you brought headphones and all, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Then go have fun. I got some stuff to work on anyways.”

“Thanks Clay, sorry we’re not spending more time together.”

“Hey I got to deal with your whiny ass for a decade.”

“And I got to deal with your angsty self as well.”

They part ways and Patches ends up following Dream. 

“Aw, so you do love me,” he coos as she hops on the bed. 

He slips on the headset and steps out of the AFK spot in the spider farm. Tommy stopped streaming, but George and Bad are still going. He clicks over to VC 2. 

“Hey Dream!” George greets. 

“Hiii!!” Bad and Sapnap chorus. 

“Wanna see the house? Sapnap’s helping me!”

Dream gulps before unmuting his mic, his mouth suddenly dry. 

“It looks really good!” Bad pipes up. 

Honestly, Twitch did George a dirty. His voice is so much clearer on Discord than on stream. Twitch doesn’t capture the slight lilts and tones that George’s voice expresses. 

“Sure thing, where are you?” He asks. 

“Head down the Prime Path to Bad and Skeppy's then go diagonal left behind it.”

“I’ll be there in a few min.”

“Hey Dream why don't we have horses?” George asks. 

“I really don't know, maybe you should ask the other person in the call.”

“Hey it's not my fault Spirit got in the way!”

“What about Tommy’s cow, Niki’s fox, Fundy’s fox? Did they get in the way?”

He’s silent. 

“Yeah. I’ll just run everywhere so I don't have to live through that again.”

“And I don't have a saddle.” George adds. 

“No one really goes fishing either. We don't live above many cave systems so not many dungeons.” Sapnap explains. 

“All right mister big brains,” Dream rolls his eyes. 

Dream reaches the end of the Prime Path to see Bad landscaping around the quartz mansion. 

“Hey! Got any spare quartz?” Bad asks. 

“Sorry, I don't. I can help mine some later if ya want though,” Dream says before continuing his walk. 

He eventually makes it to the hillside cottage the two built. George is planting some flowers while Sapnap creates a small pathway. 

“Wow looks nice guys,” Dream says as he circles the build. 

“I'm gonna end stream now I think,” George announces. “we did it guys, we have a new house!”

“Good job George,” Dream laughs. “Proud of ya you did math!”

“Yeah! Oh, thank you Dreamy Julia for the $10, can you tell everyone we love you? You make our days so much better and you guys never get enough appreciation. Aw thanks! Dream, Sap, Bad, everyone loves you.” George reads. 

“Aw love you too muffinheads!”

“How can they not? Love y'all!”

Dream pauses before continuing the chain, knowing the stream is waiting for him. 

“Ditto,” Dream laughs. 

“Alright, I'm gonna log off for the night. Goodnight!”

“Goodnight George’s stream!” Bad yells. 

"Night!” Sapnap and Dream chorus. 

George goes quiet, probably muted to finish closing the stream. 

“Is anyone else streaming?” Sapnap asks. 

His voice sounds like he’s avoiding something. Like he has more on his mind.

“I am, why?” Bad responds with a confused tone.

“Just wondering, hey Bad’s stream what’s your favorite number?” 

“SAPNAP NO WHY!!!!!!” Bad screeches. “That’s it you muffinheads I’m putting you on emotes only mode.”

Bad then leaves Discord to handle his chat, leaving Sapnap and Dream. 

“You okay Dream?” he asks. “You went really quiet after that last dono.”

“Yeah,” Dream sighs. “Uh, I was just kinda zoned out..”

“Oh,” Sapnap pauses, doubt creeping into his voice.

“Don’t worry bro, nothing’s goin on. I would tell you,” Dream assures.

_But that’s the exact opposite. Everything happened._ _I’m just too much of a wuss to actually say anything. Well… it’s not like anyone would care anyways._

“Okay Dreeeeaaaammm. But seriously, I’m here if you need me.”

“Thanks Sappy,” Dream reciprocates the teasing name to try and ease the tension.

“Are you doing okay other than that? You did sound pretty out of it yesterday too.”

“I haven't been sleeping well, to be honest.” 

“Do you want to try calling while you fall asleep? That sometimes helped a few years ago whenever you got anxious.”

As Sapnap talks, a chime rings out, announcing George’s return. 

“Yeah I guess, you get to hear how loud my cat snores,” Dream awkwardly chuckles, trying to ease the tension. 

“Bet she takes after her dad,” Sapnap follows along, causing Dream to laugh as he goes to take a drink. 

“What’d I miss?” George asks, voice chipper. 

Dream is slightly shocked by his sudden appearance and coughs on his water. 

“Woah Dream don't die, I know my voice is sexy.” Sapnap smirks.

The trio burst out laughing, the atmosphere returning to lighthearted banter. 

“Are you guys busy today?” Dream asks. 

“Nah, school starts next week so I'm trying to enjoy the time I have.”

“It’s only 10 so not really. Why?”

“Wanna slowrun minecraft? No recording, no stream, just the three of us like old times.”

“I’m down,”

“Sure!”

“Alright let me get the server set up.” Dream says. 

Minutes later, they're in the familiar realm of blocks once again. 

Despite their goal to slowrun the game, they instinctively drift towards the village nearby for food. 

“Alright where do we want to make this house?”

“How about the beach?” George suggests. “I see some turtles and a coral reef to our left.”

“Sounds good, oak or Birch wood?” Dream asks. 

“Let's do birch, I've always wanted to make a house of that cool blue wood. Blue and birch would look neat.” Sapnap explains. 

“Alright, Dream, wanna help me get iron and stone?” 

“Yeah, there's a cave over there,” Dream punches in the general direction of the cave. 

They get to work in comfortable silence, basically playing Minecraft like they always used to. 

After half an hour, Dream and George emerge from the cave with full inventories. 

“Hey Pandas, we’ve got like twelve stacks of iron and two stacks of diamonds.” Dream says. 

“Oh my God what is with you and calling me Pandas!” Sapnap exclaims as they deposited the iron into furnaces. 

“Nice work on the house Pandas,” George giggles. “I’m gonna start a farm and grab some animals, we ate all the bread.”

“I guess I'll chop some more wood.” Dream says. 

“Can you grab some spruce wood until we get the blue wood? I’m almost done with the house but I want this to look  _ noice _ .” Sapnap asks, exaggerating his tone on the last word.

“Sure thing snapmap.” Dream coos, holding back laughter.

“If you call me anything but Sapnap we’re gonna have issues.” Sapnap grumbles seriously before hitting Dream with an iron sword. 

“Hey!”

They continue to brawl until Dream comes out victorious. 

“Haha got ya,” Dream smugly comments. 

He heads off into the woods with his iron axe and starts chopping trees. Then, he gets a whisper. 

**Georgenotfound whispers to you: you good? You sound a bit down**

**You whisper to Georgenotfound** : **yeah just having trouble sleeping**

**Georgenotfound whispers to you: is it nightmares?**

_ Yeah it's nightmares but it’s also you.  _ Dream thinks. 

**You whisper to Georgenotfound: yeah, they’re not as bad as they sound**

**Georgenotfound whispers to you: ok just checking, feel free to call if you need anything**

They continue playing well into the night until they defeat the ender dragon six hours later. 

“Pretty good for a slowrun.” George shrugs. 

“Yeah,” Sapnap yawns. “Alright I think it's bedtime for me I'm tired.”

“It’s like 9 for you guys?” George asks. “kinda early for you two.”

“Same, I should go to bed.” Dream agrees. 

“I mean I gotta enjoy my beauty sleep until school starts.”

“I’m just tired, I've been up real late all week honestly.” Dream says. 

“Alright well goodnight guys,” George yawns. 

“G'night!” Dream and Sapnap say before George leaves the call. 

“Wanna switch to private vc for our sleepover?” Sapnap asks.

“Sure,” Dream nods before disconnecting. He switches to his phone’s discord and calls Sapnap. 

“Why do we always pick discord when we have Snapchat and phone numbers?”

“I dunno,” Dream chuckles. “I guess habit?”

“Maybe. I gotta brush my teeth then I'm ready to start our sleepover. Wanna braid your luscious hair?” Sapnap teases.

“I know my hair is long Sap,” Dream rolls his eyes. “You’re just mad your hair isn’t as soft as mine.”

“Sureeeeee,” 

\---------------

Dream walks around the house to turn off the lights and lock up. He approaches the guest room to hear Drista accusing someone of being an Imposter. 

He knocks on the door and waits for her to open it. 

“Yeah?” She asks as she opens the door. 

“Just saying goodnight, you winning?”

“Hell yeah,” she laughs as her headset explodes with a chorus of protests. She mutes herself before continuing. “It’s early for bed isn't it? Are you becoming a boomer?"

“Hey once you hit the ripe age of 21 sleep becomes sacred.”

“Yeah yeah, goodnight Clay, next round’s starting.”

“G'night,” he laughs. 

He returns to his room and lays down with Patches. He plugs his phone in next to his head and hears Sapnap moving a blanket around. 

“Goodnight Dre, sweet Dreams,” Sapnap snickers. 

Dream chuckles and says, “Night Sappy Nappy.”

They fall into a comfortable silence, both obviously tired. 

\-------------------------

Dream opens his eyes to see him standing on a floating island. The floating island is falling. It's falling at terminal velocity, but somehow he isn't falling off. 

The wind whips through his hair and chills him to the bone, but he’s still standing. He turns to see a real life version of the community house, crafting table floor and all. George is standing in the doorway, this time looking normal. He even has his clout glasses on. 

He smiles when he sees Dream and waves. The only thing he can hear is George’s laugh, clear as day.

Dream takes one step forward and is launched into the sky. 

He screams in fear, his stomach nothing but a pit. The wind roars in his ears as he spreads wide, trying to right himself. 

“It's not real it's not real it's not real”

He manages to right himself and then looks down. The ground is getting closer and closer. 

“no no NO NO IT'S NOT REAL IT’S NOT REAL!” he cries out loud, but his voice is carried up into the wind and he can’t even hear himself. 

\---------------------

He lands on his bed and sits up panting. He shivers from the cold sweat and lays back down with Patches. 

He then remembers he was on call with Sapnap.

_ Shit, did I wake him up? _

He quickly turns over his phone to see  **Call ended: 1:24:52**

_ Why was I expecting him to be here? He probably wanted to actually sleep. _

He sets the phone back down before turning over and resting his hand on Patches. She inhales deeply before letting out a small snore, her whiskers twitching. Dream smiles, seeing the cat sleep peacefully. He only wishes he could do the same.

_ Why did I dream of falling… I hate falling. And why was George there again? _

He hears footsteps outside his door before a soft knock rings out. Patches’s head snaps up, attentive to the intrusive noise.

“Hm?” Dream grunts, prompting the person to open the door.

Drista slides into the room, her face illuminated by the moonlight through the window. She looks worried.

“Are you okay? You sounded like you were panicking.” She mumbles, yawning through her words. 

“Yeah, just a bad dream.” Dream responds, looking back at the ceiling.

“Oh, okay.”

“Sorry if I woke you.”

“It’s okay, I was actually just heading to bed.”

"Alright, thanks for checking in though.”

“No problem, good night.”

“G’night little bird,” Dream smiles softly as the door slides shut.

He slowly fades in and out of sleep. Every time he starts falling asleep, he feels that plummeting sensation again and it shocks him back to consciousness. 


	4. Donation

The last time he wakes up, he nearly gets blinded even though his eyes are shut. Light illuminates the room, shining behind his eyelids. 

_ There’s no use trying to sleep now. _

He groans as he sits up, his body lagging with exhaustion. Patches lets out a small  _ mrew _ indignantly as the pillow she’s resting on gets shifted. He pets her head as a small apology before checking his phone once more. He has a text from Sapnap from sometime last night.

**Sorry dude a storm came through and killed the power for a few hours. My phone died. Hope you slept well though**

He responds, trying to stay neutral. He isn’t mad at Sapnap per say, just annoyed at the situation. His tiredness isn’t helping either.

_ It’s all good, hope the power is back on to stay for ya _

He decides to lay back down for a bit, just petting Patches. She purrs lightly before opening her eyes. She stares Dream down for a few moments before sitting up and yawning. She stretches languidly and then starts meowing.

“Alright alright, I get it. You’re hungry.” Dream mumbles once she starts tapping his face with her paw. 

He gets out of bed at the insistence of the feline. Stretching each of his limbs, he makes his way to the kitchen where he sees Drista sitting at the counter.

“Moorrrnin,” she calls teasingly.

“Mornin to you too. How’d you sleep?”

“Good, your guest bed is like ten times better than mine.”

“Well you did help me pick out the mattress.”

“True,” she chuckles.

“Mom’s coming in like an hour right?”

“Yeah, I’m all ready to go.”

“Wanna watch some spongebob or something?” 

“Sure, we haven’t done that in a while.” she responds, a smile on her face.

“I’ll go make lunch in a minute,” Dream nods as he grabs the stuff for Patches’ breakfast. 

The cat sits patiently on the counter like she does every morning as he mixes her food. Once she starts eating, Dream heads back into his room.

_ I should probably talk to George soon. But something still feels wrong. I’m sure he’ll understand but oof that’s gonna be a hard talk. Maybe I should talk to Sap first. Well, George can handle serious talks better. Maybe it would be better to call him first. That would be awkward though. “Hey George, I dreamed about kissing you and I died in a dream with you in it. Got any idea what that could mean?” _

To follow his routine he forgot yesterday, he reaches into his nightstand and pulls out the dream journal. It’s a neon yellow book with his Microsoft Paint character slapped on it purely for the pun. 

_ 8/9/2020: _

_ I woke up and saw the forest again. It was foggy and dark, but this time Nightmare did not wait. He attacked from the start and I somehow escaped. I made it to a grove lit by an odd light where I found George.  _

_ He sounded scared but wanted me to stay. Then he took my mask off. Then…. He kissed me. He kissed me like the world was ending. Nightmare had disappeared when I entered the grove, but I guess he didn't. George turned into Katlynn. I kept running then woke up crying.  _

_ 8/10/2020: _

_ I was on a floating er falling island. I saw George in front of a house and he laughed. I couldn’t hear anything but his laugh. Then, I was launched into the sky and I saw the ground rushing towards me at an awful pace. I woke up screaming. _

And with that, he places the notebook back in the nightstand.

He thinks back to what happened before all these nightmares assaulted him. 

\---------------------------

_ No.  _

He looks at his Twitter page. 

_ No.  _

His phone is blowing up with texts and calls. 

_ Why _

He feels bile in his throat but nothing comes up. 

Dream is looking at a tweet from Katlynn saying “Celebrating our first anniversary together! Aw isn't he such a cutie? <3”

It's a picture of him wrapped around her shoulders, a smile on his face. Anyone would look at this and think he is the happiest man on earth, but he knows exactly what he was feeling on that day. He was feeling trapped. 

Replies flood in thanks to the number of stans on the platform. 

_ Omg no way _

_ Is this dream? _

_ 🧑‍🦯🧑‍🦯🧑‍🦯🧑‍🦯 _

_ I can't believe this is this real _

_ Aw he's so cute _

_ Damn how did a guy like him get lucky _

_ Woah I know that restaurant! I went there yesterday! _

_ I've seen him at a club I think _

_ He looks really hot _

_ Weirdchamp _

_ Pogchamp _

_ Congrats dude _

_ Why are all the gamer guys so ugly _

He starts sobbing, reaching for the report button. He files the request before slamming his head on the desk. All he can feel is contraction. His throat is closing, his legs are frozen, his skin is burning. His lungs ache as he gasps for air faster and faster.

**Slam.**

_ Come on  _

**Slam.**

_ Just FEEL SOMETHING _

**Slam.**

_ GODDAMNIT _

His phone rings once more and it’s George and Sapnap. He can't see through his tears, the world spinning around him. He manages to get out of his chair before collapsing on his bed. The world is closing in on him, his body feels numb. 

_ This is what I get for ending it? I get the one thing I never wanted in the world. I needed to leave her. It was bad to be with her. But why does this hurt so much. It’s just a picture. This is an overreaction right? Why can’t I breathe. This is dumb I need to be stronger than this. It’s just a picture. A single picture of me.  _

\-------------------------------

To ward off the thoughts, he hits his forehead lightly a few times, as if he could knock the memories out of his head. It’s all over the internet, but no one wants to talk about it. George and Sapnap have been ignoring it, but he knows they are going to want an explanation soon. It’s been about a month since the picture got leaked and the hype has died down considerably. His fans have definitely spent a lot of time and effort shielding him from the haters…. Which shouldn’t be happening. He shouldn’t be hiding behind his fanbase when it’s his problem he needs to address publicly.

He throws on a sweatshirt to go with his sweatpants and heads out of the room into the kitchen.

\------------------------------------

“Bye shithead,” Dream calls as Drista heads out the door.

“Bye dumbass,” She chuckles before hugging him.

Dream’s mom comes up and hugs him. It’s an awkward hug, one that Dream isn’t a fan of. He’s glad when she lets go and returns to her car. 

_ Well, it’s been a bit since I’ve streamed. I think some others are on right now so I guess I could stream on the SMP. _

He heads back into his room and boots up his computer before grabbing a water to drink. 

_ Maybe this will help me get my mind off things. _

He opens his Discord and clicks on the Mods server.

**Hey heads up I’m streaming. I need you to mod donations. If you don’t mind, write down all of the donations you block and their amounts, I’ll send the money back later. I want you to block any mention of the face reveal scandal, I’m making a video about it soon. Thanks guys!**

He then checks to make sure tts is turned off. Who knows what could go on today?

\-------------------------------

“Hello? Hi! Welcome!” He chirps, pushing all negative thoughts out of his head. “Um, figured I’d do a surprise stream! Gonna check out the SMP today. Do kind of a world tour type thing?”

Almost immediately, the chat starts flowing in. He’s relieved to see the amount of support. The fanbase is such a supportive group. 

“Uh, yes. I am doing okay. Sorry for the sudden absence, I just needed to sort some things out. I am also working on a new video that will come out soon, so that’s been taking up some time as well.”

Dream looks around the spider spawner to see Badboyhalo chilling by the enchanting table. He enters VC 1 to be greeted with a very positive chirp.

“Hi Dream!”

“Hey Bad, how’s it going?”

“Good, I finally got enough mending books for a full set!” 

“Pog, uh, is anything interesting happening right now? I just decided to hop on stream for a bit.”

“Hmmm, well Skeppy and I are clearing out the statue room. I think Eret is adding onto his castle. Quackity and Tommy are somewhere right now probably burning something.”

“I guess we could turn this into a mining stream?” Dream suggests to chat.

The chat is full of an overwhelming  _ YES. _

He follows Bad down the Prime Path down to the museum. Both of them are muted so they can interact with their chat, though.

“Thank you Friendzlie123 for the 25, I love your content and I want you to know you make me and my sister laugh every day. Aw thanks a lot! I’m glad!” 

“Thank you HappyTrysma for the 20, Starting school soon I hope you stream more because you’re what keeps me going during homework. Aw thanks, hope you do well this year!”

“Alright you ready?” Bad asks as Skeppy joins.

“Baaaaaaaddaaaaaadddddddd,” Skeppy whines. “Where are youueuueuuuu???”   


“I’m in the statue room Skeppy, Dream’s helping!”

“Can I have ssaaaaaaanddddd???” 

“Come on down here Skeppy,”

“Nauuugoooooooo,”

“Skeppyy, I’ll be up in a minute.”

Bad then leaves to go retrieve the blue diamond player. Dream snickers as they leave vc.

“Well it looks like Bad’s got his hands full, uh, how’s it going chat?” 

He looks down to see people asking about the face reveal, if he’s doing okay, and others telling people to stop asking about it. He clears his throat before continuing.

“I uh, oh! Good news! The merch store has been updated and I’m happy to say it’s running how I’ve wanted it. I changed how the supply and money is handled, so hopefully it runs smoother than before! I put every penny from the first merch store into running this one because I want it to be the best for you guys that it can be.”

\-------------------------------------

“Thank you KartyHellPoe6 for $69, I bet you want….” His voice trails off when he notices the extremely sexual connotation of the dono. The name as well. He feels a cold wave rush down his body in fear.

“Uhh, that is completely inappropriate. Please do not donate things like that.” He mutters as he goes to block the IP address. 

As he focuses on clicking the right buttons, a dark cloud edges its way over his mind. The message. It hurts to read. He can’t stop reading it, over and over and over. 

“Hey Dream!” Bad chirps, joining VC again.

“Hi Bad, uh, do you mind entertaining the stream? I gotta go check on Patches.” Dream asks quickly, trying to keep his voice level.

He mutes himself before he gets an answer and shoves his chair away from the desk. 

_ It’s her. She decided to come back. Not now. Fuck, not now. “I bet you want to thank me for doing you a favor soon. Want to reconsider my offer? I’m sure you’re just itching for a taste. Especially for 1 year.” _

Tears start flowing as the dono replays through his head. It wasn’t a text to speech, but he can hear it read in her voice. He looks up at the screen to see the chat racing by. People are asking questions and yelling at each other. His brain freezes as his chest tightens. He shoves his fists into his eyes, trying to dam up tears. He’s not using a webcam, but his voice will be strained if he tries to speak right now. A sob wracks his body as he beats himself up.

_ I shouldn’t let her get to me. Not in front of all these people. God why does she CAUSE THIS?! Fuck Fuck Fuck If I had just DONE SOMETHING!  _

A few minutes pass and he manages to calm down enough to level his voice. 

He slides back into place and unmutes himself before saying, “Sorry guys I gotta go handle Patches. She made a bit of a mess in the other room with her litter box and some cables. Uh, have a nice day and thank you to everyone who donated and subbed!”

He quickly presses the “end stream” button before throwing himself on the bed. It’s been five hours of mining with Bad and then it gets ruined by that one dono.

He decides to go through with his plan and call George. He knows he has to do it before he gets second thoughts. He needs to get this off his chest.

**D: can you call? I need to tell you something.**

He responds nearly instantly.

_ G: Yeah of course _

“Hey dude, what’s goin on?” George asks.

“I-,” Dream clears his throat as he picks up Patches and heads into his room. “I want to talk about the photo getting leaked.”

“Oh, okay.” George shuffles around on the other line, his voice growing serious. “Is there anything that happened recently? Something that made you want to talk?”

“I’ve been having nightmares and I got a really bad dono today. I think I should tell you what happened with… Her.” Patches jumps out of his arms and onto her pillow.

“It was someone from a while back. She was talking about…. Doing me a favor. But that favor isn’t good.

“Are you talking about Katlynn?” 

“Mhm. I know why she leaked my face on twitter.”

“That seemed really out of character to be honest.”

“It’s,” Dream shudders, reaching out to pet Patches. “Um, well, you know how we were together for a year?”

“Yeah, what happened?”

Dream stays silent, a lump growing in his throat. His chest tightens as he struggles to get the words out.

“Dream? Are you okay?”

He considers saying he’s okay. That he can handle this himself. That calling George was an overreaction. 

“N-no. Not really.” He forces himself to say the truth. It’s George. He can trust him.

“Take your time, and try to breathe. Pet Patches, wrap yourself in a blanket, turn on music, or light a candle. Make yourself feel safe.”

“How do you know so much?” Dream asks, half deflecting and half curious.

“My sister has anxiety, I’ve helped her through some panic attacks. Now do what I said, make yourself feel grounded and safe.” George directs, his voice hesitant at the start.

_ Honestly the most grounding thing right now is hearing your voice in my ear _ .

Dream picks up the large throw blanket and drapes it over his shoulders before setting Patches in his lap. It feels dumb, but makes him a little bit calmer.

“Better?” George asks.

“Kind of.”

“Alright, start whenever you feel comfortable. I’m here for you and I will not judge you no matter what you say. You’re safe.”

“Uh, a bit ago, she started to get possessive. And, she wanted to be around me constantly. That’s why I hadn’t really streamed much over the summer. Then for her birthday, we went to a club… and….” He trails off, his eyes growing unfocused. 

His pulse rings strongly in his ears as memories resurface. He starts to cry as the sickly sweet scent of her perfume materializes in his nose.

“Dream? Dream!” George calls, snapping him back to reality. “Hey, focus on my voice.”

“Huh?”

“You’re zoning out a bit I think.”

“Yeah,” Dream sighs. “It, it’s shameful. What happened.”

“I don’t judge. Ever.”

“I know.”

“You can tell me anything, anything at all. You’re gay, you’re a robber, you’re a serial killer, I don’t care.” George inserts some light humor to the conversation, trying to keep Dream comfortable.

“She took me to her favorite club… and… I got drunk. Really drunk. Um, more than a drink should have gotten me.” Dream cringes, hoping George catches on.

“Oh?” George pauses, taking a moment to decipher Dream’s words. “Oh.”

“Yeah. Then, we went to her place and I don’t remember much.”

“Did she,” George takes a deep breath, making Dream’s nerves skyrocket. “Touch you?”

“Mhm,” Dream sniffles. 

“Oh Dream, I’m so sorry. Don’t worry, though. It’s not shameful. It can happen to anyone.”

“But I could have done something. I know it.”

George stays silent, unsure of what to say. If he sugar coats it, it’ll sound fake. If he bluntly says the truth, he’ll sound like he doesn’t believe Dream.

“Thanks for the support, George.” Dream clears his throat. 

“Of course, Dream. I’m always here. And uh, do you want to talk about your nightmares? Or not now?”

“Um, not now.”

“Alright, do you want to do something or just work on calming down?”

“I’m kind of tired, would you,” Dream bite his lip, cringing hard. “Would you mind staying on the phone?” He sounds like a scared child. 

“Of course Dream.”


	5. Ocean

He opens his eyes to the bright flashing of lights. The ground beneath his feet pounds with vibrations and his ears ring from the bass. He’s alone in a room with LED lights, but the air is dark. Each time the bass booms, his legs shake. It’s like an earthquake.

He can smell sweat and alcohol all around, but no signs of a source are visible. Something shoves into him and he stumbles back. Nothing is near him. What hit him?

He gets bounced around like a ping pong ball, the world twisting and turning around him. Each hit leaves a bruise, but nothing is hitting him, right?

He gets launched into a plush, velvet loveseat. He blinks, and he sees a shadowy figure approach him. It has long hair, a skin tight dress, and heels. As it gets closer, his heart leaps into his throat.

It steps closer and closer, until it’s revealed in the light. Blond hair, red eyes, silver eyeshadow, and a black dress. It’s her.

“Don’t tell me you don’t like this. I can tell you do. You shouldn’t lie to someone you love,” Her ghostly voice drills into his mind.

“I-” 

“Come on Clay,” She straddles his lap, her long legs covered by a black lace. ”It’s been ages, don’t you still love me?”

“No,” he mutters, closing his eyes and trying to pull away from her face. 

The warm weight of her body is like a ten ton elephant. It’s crushing him. He can’t breathe. Her hair feels like electric shocks and her breath on his neck. Oh god the breathing. Nothing hurts more in the world than her proximity. There’s nothing he can do but hope.

_ Please stop. Go away. _

“What did you say?” her voice drips with venom.

“No, not again,” 

“Oh Clay, you really think you have a choice?” 

Her hand runs up his leg and he screams. 

\------------------------

His eyes fly open and he grips the sheets under him. The room is pitch black and he’s completely alone. The buzz of the air conditioning is a roaring, unbearable sound. All he can think of is the horrific feeling of her touch. Memories resurface in his mind against his will.

\-----------------------

_ She looks so pretty. Her smile is so gentle. I can’t wait to show her this restaurant, I think she’ll love it. _ He feels her hand in his and the cool night chill on his skin.

_ This is a pretty neat club, not my scene though. But she’s having so much fun.  _ It smells like sweat and liquor. His eyes flash with led lights.

_ How did she guess my favorite drink?  _ The cold weight of a cup lands in his hand. He nods in thanks before drinking.

_ My head… I only had one drink though? _ He stumbles between people towards a bench to sit down.

_ “Come on babe let’s get you home” _

_ No not this feeling. I can’t walk straight. What? What is she doing? Where are we? _

\-------------------

Dream feels shudders wrack his body and tears stream from his eyes. Every breath is painful and feels like a thousand knives impaling his lungs.

_ I’m dying. I’m dying there’s no other explanation. I can’t breathe. I’m falling aren’t I? God I hate heights. When will I stop falling? Is the world spinning? Where is air? Wha whe- _

He curls over himself in an attempt to feel grounded. Every few seconds, his body jolts with another sob. 

_ I’m alive. I’m breathing. I have air. _

He tries to rationalize with himself but it doesn’t work.. He can’t breathe but at the same time breathing is all he can do. He feels sharp objects digging into his arms and he focuses on that pain in an attempt to stop hyperventilating. A few minutes pass and he feels his arms go numb.

_ Fuck _

He releases his grip on his arms before reaching up and tugging his hood over his head, nearly choking himself. 

\---------------------------------

Dream opens his eyes with a groan. He feels the hood that is mysteriously wrapped around his head in an awkward angle and notices how crusty it is. The pillow has a huge tear stain on it and the sheets are a mess. Then, he remembers: he had some kind of psychotic breakdown. 

_ Did I pass out? Fuck my head hurts. What time is it? _

He rolls over to pick up his phone. On it says  **Call ongoing - 14:07:47**

_ Wait… _

“George?” Dream rasps the question.

“Dream?” His voice is full of surprise. “Oh thank god, Dream!”

Dream cringes, his nerves skyrocketing once again. How is he going to confront George about this? He SUCKS at emotional confrontation. Hell, just telling George about Katlynn nearly tore him apart.

“Are you okay?” 

“Hm? Oh, yeah.”

“I heard you yelling, but you wouldn’t respond. You sounded… awful. I got worried.”

“Have you been awake all night? George. It’s like 5 for you!” He desperately tries to redirect the conversation.

“That doesn’t matter, I took a few naps. I was worried more about you. Please, if you’re comfortable, what happened?”

“Uh, I had a really bad nightmare…”

“To say the least, it sounded like you were dying! Have you been having this by yourself for the last few weeks, Dream?”

“I didn’t want to bother anyone.”

“But you wouldn’t be a bother if it helps me not worry?”

“I- I don’t deserve you.”

“Um, excuse me. What did you just say?”

“I don’t deserve a friend who will stay on call longer than just the night. You stayed on call from like midnight to 5 pm! I mean, Sapnap left the call when we sleep called and didn't come back. Like, what did I ever do to deserve someone like you? That’s probably why Katlynn did what she did. Because she knew I wouldn’t ever accept love. I also didn’t think anyone would really care about it, so I didn’t tell anyone.”

“I, alright that’s it.” George grumbles before the call is full of clicking sounds. “You’re in Orlando, right?” 

“Wait, what?”

“Yeah you’re in Orlando. Great. Now, I’ve got a plane to catch in twelve hours, I gotta finish editing this video. I want you to stay off the internet today and take care of yourself, alright?” He forcefully states.

“George. You did not just buy a plane ticket. That’s like $1000! WHAT THE HELL?!”

“It’s the slow season, school’s starting up soon. It’s only 450 pounds.”

“But that’s still 450 pounds!”

“It’s for a good reason, and look who’s talking. You dropped at least $5000 on me and Sap. About time I return the favor.”

“I-”

“Nice to know I can make you speechless Dream, now go take care of yourself. Be at the airport uhhhh tonight? I’ll send the flight details.”

“I can’t let you do this, George.”

“Why? Do you not want to see me?”

That question hits Dream hard. He knows it’s joking. He knows George is just poking fun. But he can’t help but think…

_ He’s just doing this because helping a weak person is the right thing to do. _

“No, no that’s not it! I-”

“Listen. Dream. I have been friends with you for nearly 7 years. I have helped you through all three breakups of your life. I have helped you work through your issues with your family. Not only all of that, YOU have helped me. You helped me through so much. Moving out, living in a toxic house with my first roommates, getting robbed, hell, you’ve helped me with my relationship issues too. You are my best friend, Dream. I will not STAND here knowing you are suffering when I know damn well I can help. I will cross the ocean to help you, whether it be by airplane or boat. If you need help, I will BE THERE.”

“I- wow. I’ve never heard you so passionate.”

“Oh you want passion? Dream? I’ll give you passion.”

“Pft wait what?!” Dream chokes on his words at that statement.

“Yeah you heard me. I’m going to bring you the best gift ever. What do you want? I’ll get it. No price limit. I am going to make sure you understand how much you mean to me after all these years.”

“Hm, how about you say I love you on stream?” Dream jokes.

“I mean I could do that orrrrr…” George goes on mute.

A few moments later, Dream’s phone buzzes with a twitter notification. It’s George with a video.

He’s sitting in his gaming chair with a wide grin, waving at the camera. 

_ Hey! I wanted to say one thing for record because some people don’t believe me: I LOVE DREAM!” _

Dream laughs as George returns to the call.

“Anything else?”

“I think that’s all George, you need to sleep because I think you’re going crazy from all your sleep deprivation.”

“Nope, I’m doing perfectly fine.”

“I think you can cut out the white knight act, George.”

“Oh you think I'm a White Knight?”

“If you were a White Knight you wouldn’t live in Brighton you’d be in the Buckingham Palace.”

“Ah but Dream, White Knights are a western trope. I shall be returning to my home lands to meet my prince.”

“Oh so I’m the prince in this scenario?”

“Do you want to be the Prince? I could make you my Lord or my lady if you wanted. I saw you in that wedding dress with Fundy, you make a very nice lady.”

“Yeah yeah you homewrecker,” Dream laughs. “Alright now go edit your video. I am still miffed you decided to drop everything though to fly here.”

“Whyyyyyyy,” George jokingly whines.

“There’s no stopping you now,” Dream rolls his eyes. “Just text me when you take off so I can be there.”

“Will do! Is there anything else my fair lady requests?”

Dream pauses, contemplating if he should voice this or not.

“When you get here… Can I have a hug? I really fucking need a hug from someone.”

“Say no more,” George says.


	6. Expectations

He hangs up the phone and sets it down before leaning back on his headboard.

_ I’m actually going to meet him. His flight is probably ten hours, and he’s leaving in twelve hours. In less than 24 hours, I will be standing next to my best… friend. Is he even just a best friend? After that dream. I can’t stop thinking about him in any other way and I don’t think it’s just shock. Gah, why is this so hard. I wonder if Niki or Eret could help. I don’t really want to bother them though.  _

_ I’ve known for a while I wasn’t straight but I didn’t think it would ever come to this. Last time I liked a guy was in high school… then I kind of just forgot about it. Thought it was just teenage rebellion. He was defense, I was quarterback. I think we got together after a dare, so it didn’t seem like a big deal. We kissed again after that party… and it felt real. But then we never spoke about it. But now… am I really gay? Or did I just want to live up to the reputation we built in high school? _

_ I know I’m a people pleaser, but are these feelings real? Or are they more of me convincing myself I’m someone I’m not? I said I was bisexual… but did I just convince myself? I love George, I do. But do I love him romantically? Do I really feel a need for him? I’ve dated two girls after Asher. One lasted a month and the next a year, but then ended like that. Maybe I just don’t have an interest in dating? Am I broken? I mean… there’s no way I am actually gay after everything that happened with Katlynn. That would be kind of weird too… saying I’m bi because of a drunk kiss I shared. I’ve only dated girls, I’ve only asked out girls, I’ve only thought about girls. Until George. But he’s just a close friend right? I can’t be gay for him, that would make it too weird.  _

He decides to peel himself out of bed and take a shower. It’s been a while since he’s showered. In the last month he’s maybe showered… twice? He’s been avoiding it. First time he showered, he nearly drowned from collapsing on the floor. Second time, he fell asleep on his bed while still soaking wet and covered in soap. 

He then thinks back to what George said. He said to ground himself. Dream heads into the hallway to grab a candle his mom gave him a while ago. He also grabs his phone to turn on music. The blanket thing is kind of out of the question for obvious reasons. He also turns off the main light and only leaves the secondary light on so the room is dim.

He turns on the water and the room is filled with sound. His finger finds his phone and he hits shuffle on his Spotify weekly mix.

The first notes strike a chord in his heart and he recognizes the song, but can’t quite remember what it’s from. 

He looks down and nearly falls into a flashback. He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and looks up. 

_ No, I’m not going to let that affect me. It’s held my life for a month now I don’t need it to do this. _

The water heats up fairly quickly, so he hops in. It feels so relaxing to be in the water rather than tangled up in bedsheets.

_ “ _ _ When I feel like nothing's gonna hold me down” _

He knows this song. George’s media share played it when Drista was over. His brain shows him images of the stream; George blushing, him laughing, him rolling his eyes, him.

_ “Hold me down, you do. Used to be scared of falling till you came around, came around.” _

He closes his eyes and lathers shampoo into his hair, letting the notes of the electronic song fill his mind.

“ _ Now I just wanna stay here, fall into midnight _

_ Want nobody else now, only you feel right.” _

His mind wanders at that lyric and he imagines how hugging George will feel. Who can blame him? 

_ He’s four inches shorter, so I can probably rest my head on his. Wait, will he be okay with hugging? He’s basically seeing my face for the first time tomorrow. I’ve seen his face for years but I’ve just been a green blob to him. That’s gotta be weird somehow. I feel like I should invite Sapnap, but at the same time, I want to just be with George. This is going to destroy me. _

\---------------------

He spends the rest of the day getting the house put back together. The guest room needs to be cleaned after Drista came over, the laundry needs to be done, the kitchen needs to be cleaned, etc. Dream speedruns the chores to make the house looking spotless.

_ Everything needs to be perfect. I do not want to disappoint him _ .

As he cleans, more images seep into his mind.

\----------------------

_ Dream walks out of his room to see George lounging on the couch, a grin on his face. _

_ “Hey Dream, whatcha doin?” _

_ “Just cleaning up some, can’t live like a slob I guess.” _

_ “Wanna come sit down for a minute?” _

_ “Of course babe,” _

\-------------------

_ “Dream! We’re out of laundry detergent!” _

_ “I got more,” He comes behind the shorter man before reaching up to the top shelf. _

_ “Damn your long legs.” _

_ “Damn my sexy long legs you mean.” _

\------------------

_ “Can you hand me the flour?” _

_ A flurry of white envelopes Dream.  _

_ “GEORGE ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!” _

\------------------

He shakes his head, unsure of what to think about the domestic daydreams he’s having. They seem to be more frequent with the anticipation of seeing George. He wants to stop thinking about his lips. He needs to.

_ Thinking about George in such an intimate manner has got to be breaking some kind of boundaries, right? Right? God damn. I don’t even know if this is real. Why do I start questioning this the day before I see him?? I wonder if Niki would be up to chat. She’s bi, she’s offered advice before. This is gonna be awkward as hell. _

He checks the clock; it’s currently 9 pm. George should be at the airport.

As if on cue, his phone goes off. 

_ G: Got through security, headed to my gate for an hour _

In response, he sends a thumbs up. He can’t really form a coherent response… hell he can’t even decide the meaning of the dreams. Alright that’s it. He has ten hours until he needs to be at the airport. And he should probably sleep as well.

He picks up the glass of water from the counter and heads to the couch to sit. He takes out his phone and looks at the time. It’s 9:15. Where did those 15 minutes go? He groans and decides to message Niki before he can stop himself.

_ D: Hey Niki, you got a min? _

Her Discord icon turns green, indicating her checking her dms. 

**N: Yeah! What’s up?**

_ D: vc? _

His phone rings with an incoming Discord call from  **Nihachu** . 

“Hey Dream, what's going on?”

“Uh hi Niki, uh I had kind of an awkward question but you're the only one I felt comfortable calling to ask.”

“Alright, is everything okay?” Her voice is tentative, like she’s walking on eggshells.

“Kind of? I mean. Ugh. How did you know… That you weren't straight?”

“Oh uh…” She pauses, taking her time to think.

Doubt rolls over Dream’s mind like a cloud and he starts to sweat. 

“Is this an awkward question? I mean, we don't talk much outside of the SMP and even then we don't talk much. I'm sorry for bothering you randomly about this.”

“No no no, Dream. Don’t worry about it. I just want to say it in a good way. I'm always happy to help with stuff like this.”

“Ok.” Dream nods, leg bouncing. 

“Well I’d say I first knew in intermediate school.” She starts slowly, taking time to choose her words.

“There was a girl on the soccer team, and she was really nice and friendly. We were best friends actually. One day, she asked if I had ever been kissed by a girl and I said no. She asked if I wanted to, and I said maybe, and she kissed me. It felt natural to me and she answered a lot of questions. We started dating after that. I have also had boyfriends before, where it felt just as natural. I’m guessing you are questioning as well right now, so I guess uhh… have you ever thought about being intimate with a guy?”

“Yeah, I had a dream about it a few nights ago.”

“How did it feel in your dream?”

“It felt unlike anything else in the moment, but it also felt… really scary.”

_ To be fair that was a nightmare so the sensation was probably twisted.  _

“Is there anything in that dream you can think of that caused that feeling?”

“Uh… It was a nightmare, so that probably isn’t the best dream to think about.”

“What about when you're awake? Do you think about kissing a guy when you're conscious?”

“Well… I have kissed a guy before. Actually. It was in high school and it felt like a one time thing so I never really got… attached? I guess. I haven’t thought about kissing a guy since then though until that dream,”

“If you don't mind me asking, who is the guy? Is he a celebrity or someone you want to know romantically?”

“Um… It’s someone I know personally.”

“Ok so it’s probably more than just an aesthetic crush, right?”

“I guess so.”

“How do you feel when you think about him? Do you get butterflies, do you feel uncomfortable, do you feel at peace?” She asks calmly, her soothing voice keeping him focused.

“A mix of all of that, because it really feels like I shouldn’t be attracted to him… but I’m not sure why.”

“Is it because of who he is or because he is a man?”

Dream stays silent, thinking. 

_ Am I confusing myself too much? Do I really feel confused because he is a guy or because it’s George? I mean… is it because he’s male or because he’s my best friend? Or both? _

“I- I don’t know.” 

“I think you’re starting on the right track now. For now, you should just think more about why you like this person. If it’s because you like how he looks, how he acts, and how you feel. That’s the most solid way to figure this out. I can’t tell you what you feel, but I can offer that.”

“Thank you so much Niki,” Dream mumbles. “If you don’t mind, could you maybe keep quiet about this? I don’t know if I’m ready to tell Sap and George yet and definitely not the internet.”

“Of course, Dream. I would never push such a vulnerable moment into the spotlight. If you need any more help, my dms are always open.”

“Thanks, uh, good night? I think?”

“Yeah,” she chuckles. “It’s 1 am.”

“Woah, I’m sorry for calling so late,” Dream chuckles.

“It’s no problem, I usually go to sleep around 2 actually.”

“Ah, I’ve had those nights before. Well, goodnight Niki. Thank you.”

“Goodnight Dream.”

They hang up and he's left nearly as confused as before. 

_ Well at least she gave some advice that could be useful. I need to think about this more. I have about 10 hours till I face him. I should probably sleep though. I need to be at the airport by uh… 10? I think.  _

He checks his phone then notices he got another text from George. 

_ G: taking off now, 10 hour flight here we go _

It was sent 15 minutes ago. 

_ Wow there’s really no going back is there? This is actually happening.  _

He stands up and feels lightheaded. 

_ What if he’s disappointed? What if I can’t be what he thinks I am? He hasn’t seen my face, what if he thinks it's ugly? What if I'm not a good host? What if Patches doesn't like him? Wait what if he’s allergic to cats? No, he has a cat. Does he have any food allergies? Am I just going to fuck this up? There's so much I want to go right with him. If I want to figure out if I like him truly, shouldn't I treat him like a crush? Or is that weird. No. Wait.  _

He sinks back down onto the couch before pulling up his knees and resting his head between them. His hands grip his hair tightly, tugging at his scalp. The feeling of panic is similar to the one he experienced the night before, but different. He can't breathe, but he doesn't feel like he’s dying. More like… He’s not enough. 

_ Wait didn't we agree to have Sapnap here when we meet up? God it's been 7 years and we’ve grown so close why am I so worried. I- everything has to be perfect. I haven’t done shit since it happened. I’m fucking disgusting, my hair is too long. I need to shave. I need to finish cleaning. I need to clean out Patches’ litter box. The house is a mess. _

Like a robot, he forces himself to stand and continue tidying up the house. His vision is blurry, like he’s looking down a tunnel.

_ Why is the AC so loud?! It’s not even that hot right now. Or is it? It feels hot but the thermostat says it's 73. And why is my mouth so dry? I gotta sit down. If I sit down though, I won’t get everything done.  _

He stumbles into his room before laying down on his bed, the room still spinning. His breathing is strained as his mind races with questions and scenarios. Eventually, though, he manages to pass out despite his urge to make the house perfect. 


	7. Embrace

_ What am I feeling? _

His fingers curl, digging into a warm yet cool substance. Sand.

His eyes flash open and the only thing in sight is a midnight sky with twinkling stars. In his left hand rests a heavy weight; an axe.

He sits up on the beach and scans his surroundings. The ocean is… glowing? It’s a luminous maroon color, almost like fireworks. Everytime a wave crashes into shore, it emits a radiant light.

Now that he thinks about it… It’s quiet. Too quiet.

He stands up and walks towards the water before dipping a hand in the glowing liquid. It sticks to his hand as he inspects it, pulsing almost like it’s living. Then, he hears a gust of wind brush against his ear.

His attention turns away from the ocean to see a figure standing in the dark, a gleaming weapon in its hand. 

A surge of fear and adrenaline take over Dream and he raises his axe. Like his previous nightmares, he no longer has control. 

He starts to advance, stalking toward the dark figure. Something about the person is familiar… Too familiar. 

The shadow sheathes their sword before pulling out a bow and arrow, then fires. Dream drops to the ground, rolling out of the way. Like a machine gun, the arrows keep coming. If Dream was in control of himself, he surely would be dead. 

He bounces around, his legs burning with effort. As soon as he gets near the shadow, his leg sweeps out and knocks them onto the ground. 

The shadow makes no noise other than a dull thud. Dream stands and raises his axe before bringing it down on the figure’s torso. A loud squelch fills the silence, making Dream sick to his stomach. 

He leaves the axe buried in the flesh before dropping down and wrapping his cool hands around the warm neck. A neck that's pulsing with blood; with life. 

One of the shadow’s eyes glitter in the moonlight; a comforting brown. Then, it croaks out one phrase before death. 

“I trusted you, Clay.”

It’s George. 

The light fades from his eye and Dream screams. Well, he tries to. This body doesn't let him scream. 

The corpse dissolves into a mass of spiders that then crawl all over Dream’s body. 

\-------------------

He wakes with a jolt, sweat dripping down his back. This time, he doesn't wake up screaming though. His muscles are frozen, his throat is tight. He scans his room and sees nothing. No one’s here, just Patches next to him. 

Forcefully, he takes a deep breath and rubs his eyes. 

_ Nothing is here _ . 

He rolls over and checks the time. 

**9:15**

“SHIT SHIT!!!” He yelps, launching out of bed. 

_ How did I sleep for nearly 12 hours?? I was supposed to be up at 8:30! _

He races out the door, head still fuzzy as he becomes alert. He leaps into his car and starts toward the airport. It’s a 45 minute drive, more if traffic. Which of course, on a Friday, there is. His phone says it’ll be an hour. 

He pushes the car to 90 in a 70 zone, trailing behind a sports car. If they get noticed by a cop, chances are the spruced up Porsche in front of him will get the ticket. 

_ What the hell was that dream? Did I really just… kill him? Oh wow… I have to sit in front of him… with these thoughts in my head. I don’t know what I’m going to do. Could I tell him about it? No, I shouldn’t. He’s here to help me. _

40 minutes into the drive, his phone rings. He hits the Bluetooth button and George’s voice rolls over his mind like a cool breeze during a heat wave. His mind flashes to the nightmare, but he quickly kicks that thought out the window.

“Hey, just landed. Uh, gate C7? I think.”

“I’ll be there in ten, sorry, I slept in.” Dream responds, slowing down as he nears the exit ramp.

“Can’t wait,” he can hear the grin on George’s face. 

“Can’t wait,” Dream whispers, unsure if the mic can even hear him. “Uh, I'm wearing a white shirt and sweats by the way.”

“I’m in a blue jumper and jeans, but you probably won't have an issue finding me.”

“Heh, yeah,” Dream chuckles awkwardly, knowing he probably should have shown George his face before this. 

“Oh and uh, we’re starting to unload.”

“Alright, sounds good. I’ll see ya in a bit, I'm entering the airport now.”

They hang up and Dream feels his heart start to race. 

_ In less than fifteen minutes, I’ll be next to George. _

He grabs a parking ticket then zips up the parking garage to find a spot. Honestly, it would have been cheaper to just pick George up off the curb, but Dream doesn’t want to waste any time. 

He nearly forgets to lock his car; his mind is elsewhere. As he approaches the stairs, he feels his legs start to shake. The moment he’s been waiting 7 years for. 

He passes through the door and is hit with a rush of cool air. 

_ George is probably going to hate the weather _

He chuckles at the thought before heading to the C7 baggage claim. No matter how tense he is, he forces his body to move languidly and stay relaxed. He sits down in a chair and watches the crowds like a hawk. 

People pour out of the doors in groups at a time, allowing him to scan each of them. Then, he sees him. 

Blue hoodie, jeans, converse, and his hair. George has a wide look on his eyes, one of wonder and anticipation. Dream stands suddenly, which gets George’s attention. 

A grin spreads across Dream’s face as he recognizes George, but it takes George a few more moments before he realizes. Dream has never seen such a wide, beautiful smile on George until now. 

Suitcase in tow, George speedwalks to Dream. Dream moves to meet him in the middle, heart racing with elation.

_ He really is short… pfft.  _

Dream starts to raise his arms for a greeting hug before George casually grabs his hand and pushes it down to their sides. He gives it a firm grip, as if he’s hugging Dream through his hand.

“I don’t wanna draw attention and I have a feeling you’re gonna want this to be in private if you get emotional.”

Dream nods, trying to not show his nervousness. 

“Uh, shall we head out then?” Dream turns to start walking out.

“Yeah, jeez you’re tall,” George laughs, breaking the quiet. 

“Nah you’re just short.”

They step outside of the doors and Dream turns to George, knowing exactly what he is about to witness.

“Holy fuck,” George gasps. “It’s so hot, and the air is like steam!”

“Yeah, it’s Florida,” Dream laughs.

“It’s like hell!”

“Eh, it’s not like it’s July at least. This is when it starts to cool down.”

“It’s got to be like 40 degrees at least!”

“It’s, uh,” Dream pulls out his phone as they enter the parking garage. “100 degrees?”

“You Americans and your backwards temperatures,” George shakes his head jokingly, chuckling. 

They get into the car and Dream resists the urge to hug George once again. Honestly, it’s been awhile since he’s gotten any hug. Out of his family, he’s the most emotionally physical. His mom shows her affection through words while his sister punches him. It’s been too long since he’s gotten a real, emotionally raw hug. Sure he sucks at the emotion part, but something about a comforting touch from anyone has the power to help with anything it seems.

Dream plugs in his phone and Spotify starts up, much to George’s amusement.

“So you listen to speedrun music outside of videos too?” He muses.

“It was on my Spotify recommended,” Dream retorts, blushing. 

“I'm stupid, I forgot to get a hotel.” George groans. 

“Huh? I thought the plan was that you were gonna stay at my place?” Dream asks. 

“I didn't want to invite myself and we never stated that explicitly.” He mumbles. 

“Well then I formally invite you to stay at my place.”

“If it’s really not a bother, I accept your offer.” George mock-bows, or as much as his seatbelt will allow.

“You get to see my humble abode for the first time then.”

“If it’s anything like your ego I doubt it’s very humble.”

“Imagine living in the same house as your mom at 24.”

“Yeah, honestly, couldn’t imagine.” George snickers along with the joke.

The drive back feels more relaxed, but there’s still a slight tension in the car. Neither men want to ask about boundaries or anything serious, even though that’s why George came down, they just want to soak in the realization that they are next to each other. Dream knows George is taking stock of Dream’s behaviors and speech patterns, being the analyst that he is. George is well aware of Dream’s nerves right now.

They make it back to Dream’s house and George is shell shocked.

“Holy shit, this is like a fucking mansion!”

“It’s only two thousand sqaure feet. My neighbors have four thousand and even six thousand square feet houses.”

“Dude. I live in a 150 square meter house.”

“Uhhh…” Dream pauses to do a bit of mental math. “Wow. About 1100 square feet??”

“Yeah, we live in Brighton, so it’s nearly three times larger than houses in London. Space is limited on an island after all.”

“True, I decided to live in the suburbs because I didn’t want to deal with other people’s parties and stuff.” He pulls into the garage before parking.

“Oh is that because you host parties every week?” George teases, knowing full well that these are excuses and Dream bought a large house for his own comfort.

Dream laughs along. “Nah, I just wanted to have somewhere nice to live.”

“Do you live with anyone else? I don’t remember you having roommates.”

“No, I’m alone. Well, I have Patches. Drista and Mom visit a lot though so it doesn’t feel so empty. And I’m usually on call with you or Sapnap throughout the day, so it doesn’t feel so bad.” He shrugs and grabs George’s suitcase.

“I can’t imagine how that must have felt…” George mumbles.

“Huh?”

“You’ve spent nearly four weeks… alone? Going through everything by yourself?”

Dream is silent.

They enter the house silently, both unsure of how to break the silence.

“Hey Dream,” George calls his attention as they enter the kitchen.

“Hm?”

“Come here,” George opens his arms. “About time you redeem that hug.”

Dream feels a lump form in his throat as he rushes to George and envelopes him in an embrace. George is significantly shorter than him, so Dream has to lean down for the hug. 

The last time he had a hug this emotionally raw was… with Katlynn. The only difference though is that he knows George would never try anything. He would never push Dream out of his comfort zone. As he realizes that, his grip on the shorter man tightens. The warmth of his body is something he didn’t realize he was starved of. 

All at once, it feels like a train just hits Dream’s brain. A switch flips and that lump in his throat is released through a tear. Then another, then another until he’s crying on George’s shoulder. 

“George?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.” His voice croaks on the last syllable.

“Of course. I’ve got you.”

Sobs wrack his body as he finally realizes he’s not alone anymore. He tries to swallow back the small sounds and whimpers coming from his mouth, but he can’t. As embarrassing as this is, George says nothing. He does nothing but rub Dream’s back.

After a few minutes, George peels him off and Dream steps back quickly before wiping his face. 

_ He’s tired of me crying on him. I don’t blame him. _

He can’t really see through his tears, but he feels George’s hand on his wrist pulling him to the couch. They sit next to each other, with Dream’s legs slung over George’s. He curls over himself and buries his head into his friend’s neck, tears still falling. 

He thinks of the night after she touched him. The feeling of cold and fear of the dark. Every time he moved, he could feel her hands on him. Those touches were ghostly and painful, but George’s hands are warm and loving. 

As time passes, he feels his body grow hollow from the lack of tears. Eventually, his sobs quiet to small hiccups with the occasional sniffle. George’s hand continues to run up and down Dream’s back, offering a slight distraction from the emotional anguish he just experienced.

“George?” Dream mumbles, not lifting his head.

“Yeah?” His voice is soothing, but there’s an underlying tone of stress.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for being such a mess.” He looks up and sees George’s caring smile.

It feels so surreal to be next to him.

“You don’t have to apologize, Dream.” George whispers. “I was worried about you but now I’m glad that I’m here. I can’t imagine how cold you must have felt. You have this grand house… but only a cat and yourself in it. I’m glad I’m here now.”

“I am too.”

Dream leans his head back on George’s shoulder as he thinks. His long arms are looped around George’s waist in an awkward but comfortable hug. He shudders every few moments from the lack of air caused by crying. He just wants to forget about everything that happened for a few minutes.

“George, tell me something.” He says suddenly. 

“What do you want me to tell you?”

“Tell me about your trip here.”

“Well, I woke up at the crack of dawn, about 3 am. My flight was set for 5 am and getting to Heathrow airport is a bit of a hassle, especially with navigating the Tube. I don’t live in the heart of London, so the nearest Tube station is like a mile away.” His hand is now running through Dream’s medium length hair, almost like he’s petting a dog.

“You couldn’t get your mom to drive you?”

“Are you kidding? She’s made me change recording times for her sleep schedule.”

“True,” they chuckle.

“The Tube was almost empty, which I’ve never really seen. Well, almost empty means that there were open seats. People are always coming and going in London, no matter the time. It was only an hour ride. I saw a really cute dog there too. 

When I got to the airport, it was much emptier than I thought. I knew there would be other people, since a lot of business trips are taken on early flights, but going through security was fast. I had nearly an hour to kill by the time I got through actually. Then, I got some breakfast, I boarded the plane, and I slept most of the way. I had spent all night editing and preparing to come here because I knew my sleep schedule would be off.

Speaking of preparing, I brought my laptop so we can play Minecraft or something if you want. And I think we had a video planned to record this week as well.”

“Yeah, that sounds great,” Dream hums. “Do you want something to eat? I should have offered first.”

“I’m alright, though I would like to meet the cat that’s been staring me down for the last half hour,” George gestures to the cat tree across the room where Patches resides.

Dream sits up, stretching out a tight muscle, before noticing George’s hoodie.

“Oh, whoops. I’m sorry, do you want me to wash that?” He asks, referencing the massive puddle of tears on his shoulder.

“It’s fine, it’ll dry,” George smiles, taking off the hoodie and setting it on the coffee table.

“Ok, um, come here Patches, good girl,” Dream coos as the feline makes her way over. “This is George, he’s going to be our roommate for a bit.”

She sits on the table and makes eye contact with George, her tail swishing in apprehension. 

“She’s a sweetheart, but not the most social of cats.”

“I can tell,” George chuckles as he reaches out his hand for Patches to inspect.


	8. Stars

All at once, the boys want to do everything and nothing at all. They sit on the floor, playing with Patches, as they discuss possible things to do. Time flies by as they make small talk, and before they know it, it’s almost 6pm.

“I should probably be a good host and show you your room.” Dream says after a moment of silence. 

“Ok, yeah I could probably stand to put my stuff away.”

They get up reluctantly and Dream heads down a hallway to the guest wing. 

“So the way this house is set up is there are wings. So we've got the main guest wing that has a bedroom, a bathroom, and a sun or sitting room I guess? It’s perfect to watch the sunrise in the mornings, so this is where Patches normally is. I think there's towels and stuff in the bathroom too.”

“Thanks, geez your house is cool.” 

“Well you know what they say, a house is only as cool as its owner.”

“No one says that.” George laughs. 

Dream heads back into the kitchen and grabs a can of whipped cream to snack on. What can he say? He’s a grown man with money and a fridge. 

He puts some on his finger after a few minutes and coaxes Patches onto the counter. He pulls out his phone to film her lick the whipped cream off his hand, planning on feeding his very hungry Twitter base later. It's a short video, but she's still cute. 

“Hey Dream?”

“Yeah?” he calls back, finishing off the treat with a few head scratches. 

“You didn't tell me you had a pool.” George comes out of the hallway with a shocked look. 

“Oh yeah, it's more of a large hot tub than a pool. Come on.” They walk through the guest hallway to the back door and step into the humid air. 

“I don't think I could ever use a hot tub in such a warm area.” George scoffs. 

“It can get kinda chilly at night in the winters, but not too bad. The water isn't even that cold because of the sun.”

Dream walks over to the edge and dips his hand in. 

“Yeah we could get in sometime, but it takes a bit to fully heat up.”

They sit at the edge of the hot tub in content silence. The water is slightly chilly compared to the air, but it could be worse. It’s still sunny out, adding to the heat. He then has a random memory pop up that makes him grin with an idea.

“Have you ever been to a warm beach?” Dream asks.

“Well, the beaches in Brighton get to around 17 degrees, so I guess not? We’re kind of used to the cold though so that’s really warm.”

“Uh, 21 is room temperature right?” Dream attempts to convert the units.

“Yeah, about 21 or 22.”

“Yeah okay, how do you feel about going to the beach?”

“I didn’t bring any trunks, I didn’t think about that.”

“How could you?” Dream pouts dramatically. “You’re in one of the most tropical areas in America and you didn’t bring swim trunks? Come on, lets go get you some.”

“Oh, okay. Wait, where are we going?”

“Well first Walmart, then there’s a beach I really want to show you. It’s about half an hour from here.”

“Alright, uh, are you worried about us getting recognized?”

“Where we’re going? Not at all.” Dream grins, pulling George to his feet.

While George gets his shoes on, Dream grabs some towels, his trunks, and some chips from the pantry. He also makes sure to grab a few flashlights.

His heart is racing in anticipation. This beach has always held a special place in his heart, ever since that night during the senior class trip. It holds more meaning than just a rebellious action… It was where Dream had his first serious kiss. Granted, it also caused him years and years of questioning his sexuality. It’s a place that he’s dreamed about sometimes but he hasn’t had a reason to go back yet.

“Hey George, did you happen to bring your Enchroma glasses?” Dream calls.

“Uh, not that I know of. Wait, I may have left them in my bag from a while ago.” George thinks out loud before returning to his room. 

A few minutes go by and he emerges with his wallet, a glasses case, and his phone. 

“Surprisingly, yes I do have them. Why?”

“I'm gonna show you something that you need to be able to see color for. And also Florida sunsets are better than any other types.”

“If you say so, well it looks like it’ll start getting dark soon so we should head out?”

“Mhm,” Dream nods and heads to the garage.

They set out on their way to the Walmart a few miles away.

“So do you have any plans for this week?” George asks.

“Um, I wanted to show you around my hometown, my sister may want to visit sometime this week because she comes over often, and then I guess take you on a tour of Orlando? We could also go to Universal, I’ve got a season pass and it comes with a single guest ticket. I forgot, do you like roller coasters?”

“Some more than others, but yeah. We don’t have as many amusement parks as America does.”

“Can’t wait to take you on the Rip Rockin Ride,” Dream grins. 

“Sounds… interesting,” George chuckles nervously.

“And I also had a few video ideas but one of them is a bit more serious than the other.”

“Oh?”

“I-” he pauses, taking a deep breath. “I want to address the face reveal drama. And I think it would help a lot if you would be there with me.”

“Of course I will.” 

They pull into the Walmart parking lot and they head in to buy George swim trunks.

It’s a quick purchase with the only set back being the argument over who pays.

“I want to show you this thing, it’s on me.” Dream argues.

“But it’s my clothes.” George counters.

While they bicker, Dream manages to walk around George slowly and then slips a 20 into the self checkout machine.

“You fucker.” George mumbles, rolling his eyes.

They head back out to the car and see the sun nearing the horizon. They still have about fifteen minutes until sunset starts.

“Come on we can watch sunset on the boardwalk, but then I’ll show you the real treasure once it’s dark.” Dream says.

“So, what should I expect to see?” George asks.

“Well, I suppose it would be better as a storytime than anything. Um, in senior year in high school, we went on a week-long trip to a college campus on the shore.” His voice grows reminiscent as they get on the highway.

“We got to live like college kids, go to all the tourist stuff, and stay in dorms. It was honestly probably one of the coolest things I’ve ever done, because we were minimally supervised and it was nearly 200 kids. Well, I roomed with my buddy Asher. He ran defense on the football team, so I knew him but not as close as I probably should have. This was a nice opportunity to really get to know him though.

After a few nights, we were getting bored. So we hatched a plan to sneak out and go to the beach. Asher had visited this area a few times, so he knew a really cool place to check out at night. The only issue was, it could be considered slightly illegal and we were also minors in a dorm room. So we got the stuff to sneak out, and we ended up leaving out the bathroom window because they put us on the bottom floor.”

“Did your dorm not have windows?”

“Yeah, it did, but they were impossible to open unless you took a hammer and shattered it. Which, we were not going to attempt,” Dream chuckles. “But then we made it out after some planning. The dorm was like fifteen minutes away so we booked it because we didn’t want to waste any time. When we got there, the boardwalk was empty. Technically, it was closed, but no one ever monitored it. There was a sign but that was it.”

“Wait, are we doing something illegal?”

“It’s just a $25 fee, $50 during turtle egg season.”

“And what is turtle egg season?”

“March to October,” Dream mutters. “But that’s not important. Like I said, Florida doesn’t monitor anything if it’s not a major tourist event. Anyways, if I say anymore then it’ll be a spoiler.”

“Did you get back without getting into trouble?”

“Yeah, it wasn’t hard. We just had to make sure the window was closed on our way back in and that the hall monitor was being switched over as we went back to our room. Then we crashed for like eight hours and we ended up missing breakfast and nearly missing lunch.”

“Sounds eventful, did you get to see what you were trying to get to?”

“Yeah, but you get to see it tonight. No spoilers.” Dream says mysteriously, a grin on his face. “We talked about what we would show each other depending on who visited who, and showing you all the places I loved as a teen is what I chose. You’re about to see something that almost no one I know has seen.”

“Wow, I must be really special,” George snickers.

_ Yeah you are, George. _

\------------------------------

They make it to the boardwalk as the sun reaches the horizon. 

“Quick, grab your glasses. I know the best spot to sit.” Dream gets out of the car quickly and heads to the gate.

Instead of moving where the rest of the crowd is, he walks down the barnacle encrusted stairs to the maintenance dock.

“Why are we down here?” George asks.

“Because you can see the sun’s reflections better and there’s less people since this dock tends to be more slippery.” Dream says, sitting at the edge of the lower dock.

George joins him and takes out his glasses. Dream hears a sharp inhale that draws his attention away from the gorgeous sunset. Instead, he takes to looking at George. They agreed to wait for him to put on the glasses for a sunset until they could be together and Dream’s glad they did. The look of wonder on his face could power a thousand cities. 

“This is what you see every day?” George mumbles.

“Yeah, it’s pretty cool isn’t it?”

“It’s so colorful! And I don’t even know what colors this is! I know the red, orange, and pinks. But everything else is just… wow.”

Dream thinks back to when George first saw color. It was only a few months ago, but it feels like it never happened. Seeing color on a monitor is nothing like seeing a sunset. George also promised he wouldn’t use the glasses until they were in person together. Seeing him entranced by the colors nearly brings tears to Dream’s eyes once again.

They sit there as the sun finally dips below the horizon, casting a final pink wave over the ocean.

“Alright come on, we gotta hurry. It’s a lot easier with some light left,” Dream says, standing. 

He takes out a flashlight and beckons for George to follow him. They walk along the gravel, trash ridden, beach toward the rocky formations nearby. Dream scans the wall with his flashlight before spotting a decently large crack.

“It’s a little tight, but you should have no issue. You’re shorter than me after all.”

The cave nearly brushes against Dream’s head, making him duck for a few stalagtights. When they reach the other side, Dream steps out onto the empty, mostly clean beach. It’s a hell of a lot cleaner than the boardwalk area, but stuff still washed up on shore unfortunately. The water is glowing, but it isn’t as bright as it would be on a windy night.

“Woah, it’s so quiet.” George mutters.

“Yeah, the cliff behind us helps a lot with the city sounds. It’s like a private cove that no one has claimed. Here, put on your glasses and come to the water.” Dream bounces forward.

_ This feels like a fucking wattpad romance. _ He scoffs at himself.  _ But I told him I’d show him cool colors when he got the glasses. Right? That’s the only reason. _

“What am I looking at? The sun is mostly gone now.”

“You’ll see, come on,” Dream chuckles as he tugs George toward the water. 

“Woah, wait aren’t our clothes going to get wet?” George asks.

“That’s why we have swim trunks silly,” Dream laughs.

“Right, hang on.” George says, pulling his arm out of Dream’s hand. 

He then removes his shirt and throws it by the backpack that Dream brought. Dream’s breath stutters in shock once he sees George’s pale skin nearly glow in the fading sunlight. 

“I’d rather have a sandy shirt than a wet one,” he shrugs before joining Dream by the water.

“Fair, now come on! What I want to show you is in the water.”

“And I need the glasses to see it?”

“Yeah. Now hurry up! The temperature drops kinda fast here!” Dream laughs before they step into the crashing waves.

“WOAH!” George gasps.

Dream smiles as the shore ignites, just like in his dream. Well, his nightmare. The wonder in George’s voice shines through the serenity of the scene, filling Dream’s heart with warmth. 

“This is so cool!” George laughs, leaning down and scooping water into his hands. 

The water glows a brilliant green and cyan color, the algae lighting up the area.

“It’s like a galaxy! But in the water! They look like stars!”

“Wanna know why I said grab your trunks?” Dream grins.

“Huh?”

Dream proceeds to tackle George, knocking him over. He makes sure to not submerge the man, partially so he doesn’t get his ass beat and partially so that the glasses aren’t swept away.

“Look!” Dream wheezes, amused by George’s incredulous face.

George looks down into the chest high water and moves his hand, entranced by the algae. 

“You've probably seen these colors before, but I hope this can work as a thank you for dropping everything to come.” Dream mumbles as he slowly joins George in tracing images in the water. 

Out of the corner of his eye, Dream swears he sees a tint of blush on George’s face before the British man melts into a smile.

“You don't have to do anything but be yourself. That's all I ask. All of this is just cause you're extra as hell.” George responds, flicking some water at Dream. 

“I would dunk you but I really don't want to lose those glasses,” Dream taunts. 

“You’re just scared cause I’d dunk you.” George snickers, sticking his tongue out.

“Oh like hell you would,” Dream bellows before surging forward.


	9. Silence

George hacks up a terrible cough, making Dream cringe as he drives home.

“Are you good?” Dream asks.

“I would be if you hadn’t shoved all that salt water up my nose!” George complains. 

“You didn’t have to taunt me.”

They continue bickering the whole ride home until they finally enter the garage.

“Holy shit I’m so stupid.” George groans suddenly. 

“Yeah but what made you see that this time?” Dream chuckles. 

“It’s the 12th!! YOU TURNED 22 TODAY!"

“Oh, I haven't been online much today so I didn't notice,” Dream responds as they get out of the car. 

“Is your phone silenced? I'm almost certain Sapnap tried to call you at midnight and probably all day.”

“Yeah, it's silenced.”

Dream pulls out his phone to check his notifications and sees 73 missed calls from Sapnap, 1 from Drista, and 1 from his mom. 

“Yeah Sap’s tried calling me 73 times.” Dream laughs nervously. “Not to mention all the texts. Wanna call him with me?”

“Yeah, wait does he know I'm in Florida?” George opens his phone and his face is enough to answer the question. “I have 113 missed calls… Geez Sap.”

“To be fair you've been offline longer than I have.” Dream nods. 

“Yeah, he probably thinks something is wrong,” George says. “do you want to tell him?”

“Tell him what?” Dream leans down to run his hand along his cat’s back as they enter the living room. 

“Why I'm here. I mean, only if you're comfortable. His texts started jokingly but now he's genuinely asking if something is wrong and panicking. He asked if we’re mad at him because we've been out of contact for a little over a day.”

“I think he deserves to know, yeah. But uh, I pretty much broke down when I told you so…”

“Do you want me to tell him?” 

“God no, no. I need to be the one to say it. Could you just, be there?”

“Of course.” George says. 

Dream takes a deep breath, hands shaking as he opens his phone. They move to the couch, sitting next to each other. 

_ There's no way Sapnap would judge. Or be dissapointed. I know him. But God why is this so hard?! _

Before he can form any more doubts, he clicks Sapnap’s contact and calls him. 

It rings once before he picks up. 

“DREAM?”

“Hey Sapnap,” Dream responds, voice shaking. 

“DREAM! THANK FUCK!! ARE YOU OKAY? Please tell me if I did something wrong I'm sorry if I did.” Sapnap bursts out. 

“No, it's okay. Uh, I'm okay. Just had something important to tell you.”

“Oh, did you finally confess your everlasting love to George?” Sapnap teases. 

Both Dream and George can’t help but choke out a laugh at that. 

“Ok wait wait,” Sapnap says. “You called me with my phone number. George can’t be on call. So, why the hell is he with you? Did something happen?"

“Ye- yeah. You could say that.” Dream nods. “Uh, I haven't been doing the best lately. Especially after that last stream I had. Remember a few nights ago when we had a Discord sleepover?”

“Yeah? Did something happen after the call dropped?”

“Kind of, I had a really weird nightmare that night. But then I got a really disturbing donation on stream and that's why George is here. Because I wasn't doing that well mentally and he managed to get through to me that I needed help.”

“What happened? If you're okay with saying.”

“So you remember my ex?”

“Katlynn?”

“Yeah,” Dream says, hesitating. 

His voice grows wary and strained while his heart races. George taps his shoulder before opening his arms, offering a comforting hug. Dream leans into the embrace as he steels his nerves to continue. 

“So about a month ago, we broke up. That’s when she leaked my face. She did it because I broke up with her after our anniversary. Leading up to our anniversary, I was really distant from everything because she was getting really controlling and possessive. The night of our anniversary, she took me to her favorite bar. I've never been one for drinking but I went anyway. I had a drink… And then the rest of the night was fuzzy.”

“Geez how much did you drink? It takes like eight beers for you to get blackout drunk.”

“1.” Dream says slowly, eyes tearing up. 

Sapnap takes a moment to process before his voice grows somber. 

“Oh, oh shit.”

“Yeah. Then she took me to her place and… She forced herself… On me.”

Sapnap gasps at that before speaking, shocked. 

“Oh shit, I'm so sorry Dream. If I had known I would've tried to help.”

“No, it's okay. I hadn't told anyone because I didn't want people to see me like a victim. And I didn’t want anything else to be leaked.”

“It’s not okay that she did it, but I’m not mad at you for not telling me. But I would like to know if I need to go beat her ass cause Bad told me you got a suspicious dono before ending your stream.”

“No, I don’t want to give her any ammo online. If you talk to her about it, she could leak more.” Dream shakes his head, quickly trying to diffuse Sapnap’s rage. 

“Did you report her?”

“I couldn’t. The hospital near where I was didn’t carry male rape kits. She took precautions as well, like using protection. And by the time I got out of her house, it was too late to get a test anyways. And the police didn't believe that a 6’3 ex football player could get overpowered by a 5’4 girl.”

Sapnap growls on the other side of the phone before calming himself down. 

“That's a load of bullshit. I'm really fucking sorry you had to go through that. Why only now is George there?”

“Because I’ve been having really bad nightmares and I had to tell someone. I was nervous about telling you, no offense. You tend to be aggressively caring and I didn't want to spiral even more. I'm sorry about that.”

“No, no apologies needed, Dream. I'm glad that you did what you needed to do for your own health.”

“Thanks,” Dream nods. 

The room is silent for a few moments as they all process what Dream said.

“How are you doing George? Handling the Florida heat?” Sapnap asks, sensing Dream was done with the topic. 

“Barely, how do you two live in such a hot area?” George scoffs as he keeps running his hand up and down Dream’s back. 

Dream tries his best to listen, but ultimately zones out in his own thoughts. He keeps thinking about all the times he cried himself to sleep after seeing visions of Katlynn. All the times he had to leave a Discord call with Sap and George, usually leaving them worried. 

\-------------------

“How are you doing babe?”

“Why, why did you do that?”

“I saw your pornhub searches on the laptop, Clay. Don’t you like non-con? I sure as hell do.”

“You’re sick,” Dream spits, rubbing his eyes from the headache. “It’s called non-con for a reason. And that wasn’t me.”

“Oh? Who was using your work laptop to watch porn then?”

“A friend came over. He’s a writer, needed to write a serious scene for his book.” Dream says.

“That’s such a bullshit answer and you know it.”

“It’s bullshit that you just did that.” Dream curtly states. “Please, just let me go home.”

“Well, I’d say your dick and ass are a bit sore, so let me take care of you, alright?” Her voice oozes a sickly sweet tone. 

“No, please. Just let me go home. My mom can take care of this. I don’t want to be here anymore.”

“I’m going to keep you here for a bit longer, hun. I want to make sure you get the care you need after our little mistake.” She runs her hand through Dream’s hair, but he’s too weak to fight it. “Here, drink some water.”

She sits Dream up and he drinks the water hesitantly. He knows he needs the water, but the slightly metallic taste of the liquid sets him off. He spits it out before glaring at her.

“Stop drugging me, please. Please Katlynn.” He begs. “You had your fun with me. Please,”

“Don’t you love me? Clay? After all I’ve done for you? I pulled you out of that toxic friendship. I healed your heart after your cat died. I supported you when everyone thought you were crazy to do Youtube for a living.”

“You fucking raped me, Katlynn.” He sobs. “How could you possibly love me when you raped me?"

“I just thought you liked it rough.” She shrugs. “You’re a big boy, you’re tough. Suck it up, Clay. I went through this in college but I didn’t cry about it like a baby.”

\----------------

“Dream? Are you okay?” Sapnap calls. 

“Dream, hey, are ya with us?” George rubs Dream’s shoulder gently, shocking him out of his stupor.

“Hm? Oh, yeah. What?” He snaps out of the memory.

“Are you okay? You went quiet and then you started shaking,” George softly says.

“Y-yeah. I guess. Just, brought up some bad memories.” His words are slightly slurred, which both Sapnap and George notice.

“Ooooooh I really wanna punch Katlynn now.” Sapnap mutters.

“It’s okay, Dream. You’re home, you’re safe. You’re with me and Sap. You’re far away from her.” George says, petting Dream’s hair.

Dream takes a deep breath, smelling George’s shampoo mixed with sea salt. He clutches the older man’s waist, feeling the soft fabric of his hoodie. He slowly nods, working on grounding himself. It kind of works, but he still feels a heavy weight on his mind. It grows heavier and heavier until his muscles start shaking. Every limb feels like it’s buzzing with electricity, making him feel exhausted.

\------------------------------

It took Twitter exactly 22 hours and 14 minutes to delete the picture. Thousands and thousands of reports were flooding their servers thanks to his community. Any reposts were also reported swiftly But it took them 22 hours and 14 minutes too long to delete it.

Even 22 hours and 14 minutes later, Dream’s phone buzzed relentlessly. He heard Discord pings, phone calls, texts, DMs; all of them. He cannot touch the phone to turn them off though. Every time he looks at the little rectangle, he feels a wave of fear and distress crush his body.

22 hours and 14 minutes of silence felt like 22 hours and 14 minutes of a roaring cacophony only Dream could hear. The raging dissonance in his mind dragged Dream in and out of consciousness for hours on end. 

Then, someone bangs on his front door. He can’t bring himself to get out of bed to answer it though. If he so much as stood up, he would probably pass out. He curls up into a tighter ball, his nails scraping lazily but firmly against his legs.

_ The tingling won’t stop. Why won’t it just STOP? _

Then, the door opens. Patches meows from the living room as footsteps pound through the house.

“Clay?!” Drista yells.

She races through each room, searching for him. Each step brings a wave of anxiety to Dream. 

_ She’s going to see me. She’s going to see her big brother broken. I can’t let her see me like this. _

Then, she opens his door.

“Clay?”

He does not respond, instead he clutches his legs tighter. His grip grows painfully harsh, but it grounds him.

“Clay, are you okay?” She asks frantically as she rushes to his side. “Hey, hey, look at me? Please?”

“Hi little bird,” Dream mumbles through bloody lips.

“Clay?” Her voice grows strained and her hands brush against Dream’s wrist, trying to stop him from hurting himself.

He flinches violently, inadvertently digging his nails in tighter.

“Clay? Clay?!” She cries. “Shit, I’m gonna have to get mom.”

“Don’t,” Dream whimpers. “Please.”

He releases one of his hands before clasping Drista’s firmly. His grip shakes as she gasps at the sight of his skin.

“I’m sorry, Clay. I know you don’t want her help, but you need to go to the hospital. Your nails are bloody. Please.”

His hand slips free as another wave of panic overtakes him.

\----------------------

“Dream? You still with us bud?” Sapnap asks, pulling him out of the flashback.

“Hey Sap, uh I think it’s time to hang up.” George says carefully. “We’ll call ya tomorrow?”

“Aight, just make sure not to have too much fun without me. I just might have to fly down to Florida this week to give both of you a hug.” Sapnap teases.

“Alright Sapnap, will do,” George laughs.

They hang up, leaving George and Dream in silence. 

“Do you want anything for dinner? It’s nearly midnight.” George asks softly. 

Dream nods, keeping his head tucked into George’s shoulder.

“Hey,” George takes Dream’s hand. “It’s okay, you’re okay. Do you feel unsafe?”

Dream can only shake his head, his throat closed.

“Can you talk?” 

Dream opens his mouth to say something, but his throat is closed. No words will come out. His mind is racing, a hundred words a minute, trying to force something out. He ends up closing his mouth and shaking his head, keeping his head down to hide his blush.

_ I can’t even speak? God that’s pathetic. _

“Okay,” George looks around, taking a moment to think. “Do you know where Patches is?”

Dream lifts his finger and points at the cat tree.

“I’m going to go get Patches for you, then I’ll make something for dinner, okay?”

George gets up, carefully removing Dream from his shoulder. He cautiously wakes Patches up, trying his best not to piss her off. Robert is such a different cat than Patches, but luckily, she lets him pick her up. He deposits the feline into Dream’s lap before picking up the remote.

“Your favorite Disney movie is Mulan, right?” George receives a nod. “Can you write something?” Another nod, more hesitant.

George hands him a piece of paper and a pen before asking, “What do you want for dinner?”

In shaky letters, Dream spells out  **Reman**

“Alright, I’ll be done in a few minutes.”

Dream turns to face the tv, staring at the screen. Patches meows, getting his attention. He lets the cat lick his hand as his eyes trace the flowing ink in the opening sequence. As the scent of soup drifts from the kitchen, Dream feels himself grow more and more aware. The various stimuli drag him out of the stupor slowly, but he still feels weighed down.

After a few minutes, George brings a bowl to Dream and sits next to him on the couch.

He hands Dream a fork and makes sure Dream has enough strength to eat properly. George gets up to grab his bowl before joining Dream on the couch to watch the movie.

Dream sets his bowl down and grabs the piece of paper and pen before writing sloppily.

**Thank yu.**

“Of course, Dream. Anytime. I’ll help you however I can.” George smiles.

They sit in a comfortable silence, watching the movie as they eat. Dream feels himself grow tired, but doesn’t feel like getting up anytime soon. Eventually, after finishing his soup, he ends up just leaning on George and falling asleep.


	10. Saturday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright this is where everything goes south, from here on out there's pretty much just pure angst... yeeeee
> 
> This chapter features a scene from the Netflix original "What Happened to Monday" and the character's name is Saturday. It may be grammatically a little confusing, sorry

Dream groans, slowly waking up. 

_Where am I? It's bright. What am I sleeping on?_

He opens his eyes to see the living room and more specifically, George laying under him. His breathing halts, not wanting to wake him up. Dream’s head and arm rest on George’s chest with their legs tangled under a throw blanket. Thanks to their height difference, Dream’s legs are hanging off the couch. Patches apparently left at some point in the night. 

_What happened last night? Why are we on the couch?_

He wracks his brain, trying to remember exactly what happened. 

_We got home from the beach, then called Sap I think. Then I shut down._

He looks up at the sleeping man, trying not to move his head much.

_He looks so peaceful. He’s cute. I could just… No. Bad. Bad Dream._

He slaps himself mentally for staring at the soft lips that open ever so slightly each time George exhales. He studies his face, or at least what he can see from his angle, and finds himself staring at the stubble on his chin.

George stirs lightly and Dream lifts his hand from the older’s chest, not sure what to do. Instead, though the arm wrapped around Dream’s shoulders tightens as George readjusts himself. 

“Dream?” George mutters. 

“Hm?” 

“How are you feeling?” 

“Good, still a bit tired.”

“Cool, I gotta go pee.” He states simply. 

“Oh uh, yeah. I'll get up.” Dream says, pushing himself up, doing his best to not crush George. 

George heads to the bathroom and Dream grabs his phone to check social media. After only a few days off Twitter, his timeline is blowing up. He decides to post the video of Patches eating whipped cream with a heart.

As soon as he stands up, the cat is by his side. 

“Hey girl, are ya hungry?” He coos, picking up her food dish. 

She hops up to the counter and sits patiently next to the edge, tail waving in anticipation. 

Dream takes care to measure out the food and water before mixing them together. 

“Whatcha making?” George asks as he joins Dream. 

“Patches’ food, she's hungry.”

“What kind of bougie food is this?” George chuckles. “Robert just gets the hard food. You're over here like a chef?”

“I want her to be happy,” Dream smiles before handing Patches the bowl. 

“I’m sure she’s very happy with you as her human.” George assures before going to the living room to pick up the bowls.

“So, did anything happen last night? My head was kind of fuzzy the whole time.” Dream asks slowly.

“Well, what do you remember?” George starts, setting the dishes in the sink.

“We got back from the beach, we called Sapnap, I told him about… that… and I don’t really know the rest? It was like I wasn’t in my head.”

“You had a panic attack, I think.” George says. “You really zoned out after you told Sapnap and you couldn’t focus on words enough to speak.”

“Oh,” Dream nods. “Okay, sorry if I worried you.”

“Don’t feel like you need to apologize, you had no control over it.” George sets his hand on Dream's shoulder before opening his arms.

Dream turns into the offer and lets George hug him. George gives really good hugs. He may be smaller than Dream, but he still pours every emotion into each embrace. 

They stand there for a minute before letting go.

“So what do you want to do today?” Dream asks as he opens the pantry to get cereal.

“I don’t really know, you said you wanted to show me around?”

“Well we could drive around my hometown, but I don’t really want to stick you in a car for the entire day.”

“True, I’m also still jet lagged and you mentioned going to Universal, but that may be better for later in the week.”

“Yeah, oh and I forgot to ask. When’s your return flight?” 

George pauses before quietly saying, “I- it’s in 5 days.” 

Dream’s heart nearly shatters at the thought of only getting less than a week with George.

“Oh,”

“I forgot to tell you, I just got so excited to see you when I got here.”

“I don’t blame you, I forgot as well.” Dream agrees. “Do you want to just have a chill day, record a video or play something?”

“What video ideas do you have planned?”

“Well I want to wait to do the serious vid until maybe a day or so later. But I also wanted to do a physical siamese twins video. Like you have the keyboard and I have the mouse. Or we could also do a speedrun stream with a lucky block mod?”

“That sounds cool, you can choose which you want to do.” George hums. “I’m gonna go change, okay?”

“Yeah, I should do that too.” 

They split off to separate sides of the house to get ready.

_I didn’t have a nightmare. Everytime I go to sleep thinking about her, I get a nightmare. But not this time? Was it because George was there? I felt safe in his arms. He even asked me if I felt safe then did his best to make everything better. No wonder I dreamt about him this week. God, this feels so gay right now. I’m literally fantasizing and worrying about the guy in my house. The guy who’s been in my life for nearly 8 years._

_I need to get my thoughts straight. Well, as straight as they can be when I literally slept on him. We should probably record. That way I can edit while we film the face reveal video._

He takes off the crusty shirt that crunches with sea salt before removing his swim trunks and swiftly slipping on sweatpants.

_Can’t believe we slept in our crusty clothes. I'm gonna have to clean the couch probably_. 

When he gets out to the living room, George is seated on the couch scrolling through his phone.

“Hey Dream, did you post something like half an hour ago?” George asks suddenly.

“Yeah, it was a video of Patches eating some whipped cream. Why?”

“I think our stans know we’re in the same house,” George chuckles. “You didn’t cut the video before I came into the room, so you can hear me.”

“Oops,” Dream laughs. “Well there goes the surprise I guess. Uh, well Twitter is going to be on fire today I guess.”

“Yeaahh… but they can wait,” George chuckles. “Do you want to just take today easy? We can lounge around as long as we want you know.”

“Do you want to have a movie marathon?” Dream asks.

“Sure, what movie do you want to start with?” 

“We could watch that new Netflix original? Uhhh… the one about the one child policy?”

“Oh, is it What Happened to Monday?”

“Yeah! That looked cool, if you’re interested.”

“Sure, want me to make some food?” 

“I can do it, you're technically my guest,” Dream counters. “Do you want good breakfast or junk food breakfast?”

“Hmmm you pick? I’ll start up the movie.”

Dream nods before turning back to the kitchen and pulling out some eggs, vinegar, english muffins, hollandaise sauce, and… mini donuts.

“What are you making?” George asks, noticing the vinegar.

“Eggs Benedict? And some donuts for an appetizer.”

“What kind of a combo is that?” He laughs from the couch.

“I mean, I live alone I eat what I have it gets interesting sometimes, here have some donuts?” He slides the bag across the kitchen counter and George stands up to grab some.

“Thanks, ew you get the plain?”

“It’s all they had, I went on a busy day okay?” Dream huffs before starting the breakfast.

He may not be the best cook, but he definitely picked up a few things from watching Youtube. 

He poaches the eggs carefully, doing his best not to break anything. It’s a delicate process for someone who doesn’t cook poached eggs often.

He succeeds, sighing in relief when he sees the egg sitting on the English muffin. He drizzles some hollandaise sauce on the food before fishing out the second egg. He repeats the process before picking up the plates and carrying them over to the couch.

“Thank you,” George smiles. 

They start the movie, but Dream is only partially watching.

He can’t get his mind off last night. The emotional turmoil was awful and especially the fact that he didn’t remember going to sleep. He thinks more about the fact that he didn’t have a nightmare. 

_My mind was full of bad stuff yesterday, but nothing. I think George is really fucking helping me more than either of us expected. Still doesn’t help that when I woke up the first thing I wanted to do was kiss him._

They watch the movie in peace, with Dream getting hooked on the storyline after a bit. It’s a really intense story actually. As the siblings get taken, he watches them break down and rebuild themselves for survival.

That is, until Saturday goes undercover. She gets led to the agent’s apartment. He seems really touchy feely, which to be fair he thinks Saturday is Monday, but then he pours a drink.

Dream looks over to the cat tree and inspects Patches who is lazily draped across the top platform. He can hear the unsettled breathing from Saturday and the dubious consent. She seems so nervous and not in a good way. His head buzzes in familiarity, so he stands up suddenly and excuses himself.

“I gotta pee, sorry.” He bluntly states before leaving.

He ends up sitting on his bed, head in his hands between his knees. He doesn’t feel scared or like he’s going through flashbacks though. More like… his mind is buzzing from 0 to 100 and back too quickly. All of the noises and body language felt too familiar. He can almost taste the bitterness of whatever liquor Saturday was drinking. His breathing grows ragged out of unsureness. 

He hears a knock on his door and he hears George from the other side.

“Dream, are you okay?”

_“Are you okay” what a dumb question. It’s so commonly asked and never meant truly._

“Mhm,” Dream mumbles, rubbing his temples slowly. 

“Can I come in?”

Dream wants to say “no.” He needs to say it. He’s spent long enough worrying George with his emotions. But he can’t seem to bring himself to say it this time. He wants to have George hold him again, but not like this. 

He runs out of time though.

“I’m coming in, okay?” 

Light floods the room from the hallway and the British man steps in slowly. He watches his steps, taking care not to spook Dream.

Dream feels a weight land next to his foot and hears slow breathing in front of him.

“Hey, can I touch you?” 

\------------------

“Babe come on!” Katlynn coos. “Can I touch you? Please? It’s my birthday.”

Dream looks around at the fancy restaurant they’re sitting in before shaking his head.

“I’d rather not, KitKat,” He declines. “We’re in public and your friends will be back in a minute.”

“Come on, stop being such a baby,” She sighs before resting her hand on his crotch.

He stiffens at the contact, frozen with shock.

\----------------------

Dream flinches slightly at the phrasing before calming himself down and nodding.

He feels George’s soft hand wrap around his wrist and he jerks away.

\---------------------

“What are you doing, Clay?!” Katlynn yells before grabbing Dream’s wrist. “Our fun isn’t over yet!”

He can’t say anything in response, nothing more than a whimper leaves his lips.

\--------------------

He can feel the tension and hesitation in the room. He then feels skin against his forearm, but it doesn’t feel like George’s hand. It feels softer, smoother. He feels a joint and recognizes it as the back of his hand.

George runs the backside of his hand across Dream’s skin to avoid triggering him again. His heart wrenches at the sight of his best friend in such despair. 

“Hey, Dream. Can you look at me?” 

Dream takes a deep, shuddering breath before letting go of his head and slowly looking up. His eyes are watering slightly, distorting the image of George. 

George holds up his other hand, offering it to Dream. The blond carefully moves his left hand into George’s, allowing him to trace patterns with his thumb. 

“You’re safe, I promise.” George whispers, brushing each of Dream’s knuckles with his finger. “Saturday is just a movie character. She’s not you. You’re safe in your house with me.”

He moves his hand to the back of Dream’s before forming a fist, enclosing Dream’s slightly larger hand. He brings Dream’s hand to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to the skin. He then trails their hands down until Dream’s palm rests against George’s chest, letting Dream feel his heartbeat.

“Feel that? I’m breathing slowly right now. Can you try to match it?”

Dream twitches his fingers lightly, feeling the soft hoodie. A light beat pulses under his touch and he looks at George. His eyes are gentle, full of love. Nothing like Katylnn. 

He starts to try and slow his breathing, matching George’s exaggerated sounds. 

“Will a hug make this better or worse?” George asks.

Dream shakes his head lightly before croaking a response.

“C-can we just stay here?”

“We can stay as long as you need, Dream.” George assures him without an ounce of hesitation.


	11. Help

It’s dark. It’s so dark. And cold.

He paws at his face, shuddering when he feels the plastic sheeting of his mask.

_ Why did I choose this mask for my brand? _ He curses at himself.

His body moves without his permission, swinging a leather knapsack in front of him. He drops to the ground and digs out an axe and armor, just like last time. The darkness surrounding him sends waves of fear through his mind. 

The axe is a hefty weight in his hand. It haunts him after killing George. He looks at it and sees his reflection. His hair is disheveled and he can’t see his face. All he sees is an unsettling porcelain grin.

His legs straighten and throw him forward, starting the chase.

Mist pools around his feet, the cool tendrils brushing against his skin. He wants to close his eyes and let whatever happens happen, but he keeps running. 

“Ohhhh Clay!” A sickly sweet voice croons.

His heart sinks as he hears the pounding of footsteps behind him. It’s her. She’s never appeared in the manhunt dream before though.

The air grows thick with humidity, then his foot falls into sludge. The mud swallows his leg, sinking him down to knee level. Clawed hands wrap around his shoulder and he screams. Blood pours out of his pores where her hand is.

His cries ring through the forest for miles, growing louder by the second. She backhands him to the ground with a growl. He quivers, trying to force himself to stay still. However, he stands up.

In a flash, she’s gone. 

He looks to the side and sees George wiping blood off his mouth, a dagger in his hand, and a corpse next to his feet. The moment the demon-of-an-ex fades away, Dream regains control of his body.

“Are you okay?” He asks, concerned.

“I can’t be here, not again.” Dream mumbles, turning to run.

“Wait!”

He doesn’t wait. He keeps running into the darkness. Then he hears a metallic *shink* and feels it.

He looks down to the pool of blood forming on his shirt before waves of pain, sharp stabbing pain, radiate from his torso. 

“-eam! Dream!” He hears faintly as he falls to the ground, blood dribbling out of his mouth.

\------------------------

He launches out of bed, hands and feet connecting with something solid. He curls up into a ball, running his hands over his body. No holes, no blood, no dagger. No mud, no mask, and no Katlynn.

_ God why is this room so cold It’s so cold it’s buzzing why is everything loud I can’t no no no no no Katlynn no why _

“Dream?” He hears from the corner.

His head snaps up, startled by the worried tone. What he sees fills his heart with dread and regret.

George is pressed against the wall, his eyes twinkling with fear. His breathing is shallow but fast and he’s trembling. He’s holding his side with his hand as if to stop the throbbing of a bruise.

“George…” Dream mumbles, taking in the sight. “I have to go.”

He stands up and pulls on a hoodie from the floor before heading out of the room. 

“What? No, Dream, it’s okay. I’m okay.” George walks towards Dream and blindly tries to grab him. 

His nimble fingers wrap around Dream’s wrist by accident. Dream throws him off, panicking from the motion. He nearly hits George by and he feels like he’s going to be sick.

“NO, please, just, back off. I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to hurt you,” Dream mindlessly repeats as his breath quickens. 

He surges out of the room and grabs his phone and keys off the counter before heading to his car. George is behind him but Dream doesn’t hear what he’s saying. 

He zips out of the garage, nearly hitting his mailbox, and speeds down the road. It’s night, now. He checks the clock and sees it’s around 7. He’s spent almost the last 16 hours unconscious. 

Tears flow from his eyes as realization sets in.

_ I hit him. I hit him. I hit George. I- I can’t live with myself. Never. I hurt him. I hurt him.  _

A choked sob leaves his mouth as he drives, not sure where he’s going. His phone rings from George but he can’t hear over his cries. His hands are clenched around the steering wheel, his knuckles turning white. He comes to a stop at an intersection and can barely see the stop light through his tears.

He pulls into a Walmart parking lot and parks before crying even louder.

“FUCK!” he cries. “FUCK I HURT HIM!”

In the back of his mind, he knows it was an accident. He knows George will forgive him. Doesn’t mean he won’t forgive himself though. Thoughts bombard his mind as he clenches his hands harder, feeling a stinging sensation radiate through his palms. He looks down and sees red crescent indents in his hands that look like they are about to start bleeding.

His phone starts buzzing wildly, no longer from George’s calls. He looks down and vaguely makes out the word “Panda” on his screen. Sapnap is texting him a mile a minute. Each one is increasingly worried, asking what happened and for him to please call. He turns off the notifications from the two.

He throws his phone to the side before digging his palms into his eyes.

_ I shouldn’t be crying this much god this is embarrassing I’m just a fucking baby aren’t I?? _

Then his car rings. Someone is calling him from his phone number instead of Discord. It’s Mom.

He debates heavily whether to pick it up or not. 

_ I don’t want her to worry. She doesn’t need to worry about me. She doesn’t even know about Katlynn. She doesn’t know why should I tell her while I’m breaking down in a Walmart parking lot?? _

Before he can overthink it much more, he jabs the glowing green circle.

“Clay? Are you okay? George messaged me saying it was important. He said you need help?”

Dream sniffles loudly before responding, “Hey Mom.”

“What happened? George doesn’t contact me unless it’s an emergency. Are you safe?”

“I- I don’t know.”

“Do you need me to come get you?” She asks.

“No, no, no, I’m fine. I’m fine.” He mumbles.

“Can you tell me what happened?”

“I hit him.” 

“What?”

“I hurt George,” he croaks, each syllable causing him pain. “I hurt him.”

“Oh Clay, I don’t think he’ll be mad judging from how panicked you sound. What happened?”

“I had a nightmare and I woke up and I felt scared. I was so scared. I couldn’t see around me but I hit him I hit him Mom I hurt my best friend.” 

The words are falling out of his mouth faster than he can recognize. He doesn’t know why he’s telling her all this. The ragged breathing he hears can’t possibly be him… can it? 

“Clay, slow down. I need you to breathe. Alright? Try to breathe.”

“I CAN’T!” He cries, hiccuping. 

She says something that Dream can’t hear. 

“Alright, Clay? Listen to me. Where are you? I don’t want you to be by yourself right now.”

“I’m at the Wal _*hiccup*_ mart on 10th.” He says.

“Stay on the phone with me, alright? I’ll be there in a few minutes.” 

\--------------------

Dream feels lightheaded from hyperventilation as he sees a familiar Ford pull into the parking lot. It parks quickly before his Mom steps out and rushes to his car.

He opens the door and steps out of the car before she envelopes him in a hug. She’s nearly a foot shorter than him so he has to lean down to curl around the unfamiliar embrace.

“Clay, you’re alright. I’m here.” She assures him. 

He holds onto her for dear life, his body shaking like a leaf.

“Come on, let’s sit.” She says, pulling away and opening the back of Dream’s car. 

They shuffle into the roomy backseat before she hugs him again.

_ Why is she hugging me so hard? She never hugs me like this. She hates hugs. _

“Can you tell me what happened before this? You said you had a nightmare. Have you been doing okay?”

Dream shakes his head before sniffling and trying to clear his throat.

“I, I had my face leaked, remember?”

“Yeah, you were pretty upset about that. You went quiet for a while, had us worried.”

“Katlynn did it.” He chokes on her name. “She hurt me.”

“Oh baby,” She coos, rubbing her hand through his hair. “I’m so sorry, I’m so so sorry I didn’t help you.”

They sit there in silence until Dream’s breathing levels out. His head is still racing with thoughts and a lack of oxygen, but his lungs no longer strain to keep up. His mom rambles on and on about anything and everything in the world. Anything to keep her baby distracted.

It takes Dream over an hour to fully settle. By that point, his body aches with exhaustion. He lifts his tearstained face off his mom’s shoulder.

“Thank you, Mom. I’m sorry for worrying you.”

“There’s no need to apologize, Clay. You needed me, so I came.” She smiles softly, cupping his cheek with her hand. “I think you should get home though, George is waiting for you.”

“About him, can I tell you something?” Dream mumbles.

“Of course.”

“I, I think I like him.”

“Oh?” She smiles again.

“Yeah, I think I do.”

“I think you know who you like and why you like them, Clay. I trust your judgement. He’s a good man from what I’ve heard. And I’ve heard a lot.” They chuckle at that.

“Yeah… But I yelled at him. A lot.”

“You were scared and I think he was too. You just need to talk it out, you know?”

“Alright.”

“And I think you should look into therapy. After what I just saw, I don’t think it’s healthy for you to try and heal yourself.”

“Okay, I was thinking about that but I don’t know where to find it.”

“I can help you later if you want?”

“Okay, thank you. Seriously, I mean it.”

“I’m just glad I was able to help you, Clay. Now can you drive home?”

“Yeah, I can.” Dream nods before getting out of the backseat.

They hug one last time before setting off on their separate paths home.

Dream takes a deep breath before looking at his phone. There are over a hundred messages… not to mention the 70+ voicemails.

They range from George panicking, George angry, George bargaining, George apologizing, and everything in between. Sap’s messages are full of worry and joking anger. He opens the most recent voicemail that George sent. 

“Dream. Please. Please come back. I need to talk to you. I’m okay. I’m not hurt. Please.” 

He sounds tired.

Dream buckles his seatbelt and starts the car before heading out of the parking lot.

He drives into the left lane, preparing to make the turn. His mind flashes to the voicemail over and over again. The pain in George’s voice… it hurt.

His thoughts are cut off by the screeching of tires and the crashing of metal.

\--------------------------

_ There has been a vehicular crash at the intersection of 10th Ave. and Champion Way. Four vehicles involved, no fire. First Respondents en route.  _


	12. Sterile

He’s falling

So

So

So

So

Far. 

But everything must land eventually

\-------------------

His eyes fly open with a gasp, his hands pushing him up. The room is dark, it's dusty too. Faint strands of light weave through the particles in the air, making it look like snow. 

He runs his hands over his body checking for injuries. Nothing. He can hear the faint buzz of the fan, but no metal. No skidded tires. Nothing. All he feels is his sweat streaked skin. 

Someone knocks on the door before cracking it open.

“Dream? Are you awake?”

“Yeah, George? You can come in.”

He enters the room with a bottle of water. 

“You okay? I heard you mumbling but didn’t want to startle you.”

“Yeah; just… A really. Really bad dream.” Dream nods, leaning back on his pillow. 

“I've been there, it's not fun. Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really,” he shakes his head. “What are you doing?”

“Came to wake you up, it's nearly noon. I fed Patches too.”

“Thanks, did you remember how I make her food?”

“Yeah, you mixed some of that small and large hard food with a bit of water and canned. She may have gotten a little extra but I think I got really close.”

“Thank you, George. I’m surprised she wasn't in here swatting my face to wake up.”

“She came to my room for some reason and did just that,” he chuckles. “she's got a good swinging arm.”

“Trust me you haven't experienced half of it.” Dream laughs. 

George sits on the bed next to Dream and his eyes hold an odd emotion. They seem… Sad? Nervous? His back is to Dream with his eyes scanning the blond over his shoulder. His fingers tapping the bed rapidly. 

“You okay? You look worried.” Dream asks. 

“I- there's something I've been meaning to tell you. For a while now.”

“Okay? I won't judge, promise.”

He doesn't get a verbal answer though. 

George turns around before leaning down and taking Dream’s lips with his. Dream lets out a shocked gasp, his eyes flashing to the bedroom door. 

George sits up, his eyes connecting with Dream’s. 

“Was that okay?” He asks tentatively. 

Dream looks up at him, dazed. He finds himself looking between George’s eyes and his red lips. He can’t stop himself. He leans up and cups George’s chin before connecting their lips again.

His heart is pounding as he once again tastes that sweet chocolate. George’s hand comes up Dream’s bare chest, sending fireworks through his veins. The shorter of the two pulls away for a moment to throw his legs over Dream’s lap before greedily kissing him again. 

Dream’s chest starts to burn from how intense this is. It’s like he’s miles and miles in the sky where the air is thin and George is his only source of oxygen. He’s his life line. 

George quickly sheds his shirt, pressing their skin together. It burns from how warm he is. Dream lets out a small keen at the sensation, his eyes rolling back. 

George starts kissing lower, his lips caressing the supple skin underneath Dream’s chin. A little sting brings a low moan out of his throat. George starts to lightly nibble and suck in a meticulous pattern, taking care to mark Dream’s skin carefully. 

Dream’s body feels heavy from how hard he’s shaking. His hands fly up to George’s shoulders, pushing him back slightly. 

“What's wrong? don't tell me you don't like this.” George murmurs next to Dream’s ear, sending shivers down his spine. His voice morphs into a soft growl before returning to his normal tone.

“Please, George. Too fast,” Dream chokes on air, trying to breathe. 

His chest is pounding in pain. 

_ Am I having a heart attack?? _

“Hey, it's okay, it's okay. Breathe.” George’s eyes flash blue before returning to their normal dark brown. “Do you want to just lay down?”

Dream nods and George shifts off of him before laying beside him. George wraps his arms around Dream’s waist, his thin arms radiating love. 

“I’m sorry, Dream. I’m really sorry.”

“No, it's okay. I liked it. I've liked you too for a while, George. That was just too fast for now.”

They cuddle in silence for a moment. Dream lets out a low hiss of pain. 

“What's wrong?”

“I don't know, my chest really hurts. And so does my arm, neck, and legs.”

“Just rest, it’ll go away soon.”

“Okay.”

They sit in silence for a little longer before George speaks.

“Was it worth it?”

“Was what worth it?” 

“Paying for that dinner?”

“What? What dinner?”

“The dinner at Soul. On July 2. Was it worth it?”

“What? I- I never told you the name?”

“Oh baby, do you think I’d forget our first anniversary?”

He blinks and he sees a slender hand wrapped around his. One with claws for nails.

He looks behind him and screams, scrambling out of bed. 

He hits the floor before attempting to stand. Key word; attempting. His legs buckle under him and suddenly he feels like every inch of skin is on fire. 

\---------------------------

Dream feels himself sink into his body, a light groan emitting from his throat. A hand tightens around his, so he squeezes it back. 

“-eam?” He hears faintly. 

His eyes are behind held down by iron bars but he manages to pry them open. His eyes are bombarded with the Stark white of an overhead light. Nothing's in focus just yet, though.

The hand slips away, leaving his hand cold. 

“-urse? Nurse! He’s -ke!”

He blinks a few times and the five lights slowly meld into a single glowing ball. He tries to look at wherever the voice is coming from, but he can't muster the energy. He decides to just close his eyes and succumb to the weight. 

\--------------------

_ “Build your hopes up like a tower, I'm giving you the run around _

_ I’m just a lost boy… And I’m ready to be found” _

He opens his eyes with a little less effort than last time to see only one, dim light overhead. A different hand rests on his this time. It's larger, softer. 

He manages to turn his head with a little grunt of pain and he sees George.

He’s passed out in a chair, his head resting on a bed. A hospital bed. 

Dream inhales sharply as he scans himself. He tries to lift his right hand, the one not being held, but then he feels tubes. There’s also a tube down his throat which itches like a bitch.

_ “I leave you one last kiss on your pillow. 'Fore I fly away” _

The song is sad. It has a soft, crooning voice of a man who sounds broken. 

He runs his thumb over George’s hand, feeling the smooth skin. 

George lets out a small  **mhrnnn** before lifting his head. His eyes lock with Dream’s, relief flooding his face. 

_ Hey Georgie _ , he wants to say. 

A tear runs down George’s cheek as he takes in the sight of Dream awake. Then, he leaves. 

He stands up, turns his back to Dream, and leaves. 

Dream’s heart shatters, only behind held together by the faint hope that George is getting a nurse. 

Any moment now, he’s going to hear George say “nurse? He’s awake” and then he’ll come right back in. 

Any moment. 

\--------------------

Dream is shaken out of his daze by a familiar voice. 

“A nurse will be in momentarily to check his vitals and remove his intubation tube.” a man says in a calming tone.

“Thank you,” a woman says in a hushed voice.

It's his mom. 

She walks into the room, a hand over her mouth and tears in her eyes. 

“Oh Clay, hi.”

She pulls the chair up next to the bed (where George slept for who knows how long) and sits. 

“They're going to take the tube out of your throat in a minute. Do you know what happened?”

Dream shrugs his shoulders before crying out in pain. 

“It’s okay, just settle down alright? They're gonna help you. You said you don't know what happened? Well, you were in a car accident.”

_ Yeah I got that so far _ . 

“The doctor said you fractured your collarbone, bruised a few ribs, broke a finger, and twisted your knee. I think he said the ACL was strained but didn't snap. You also might have a concussion but they want to do another MRI.”

A nurse enters the room then with a tray. 

“Hello Clay, I’m nurse Emily, I’ll be taking out your intubation tube out and checking your vitals.”

It's a quick process really. She simply takes the tube out of his lungs before forcing a liquid down his throat. 

“That will help with any swelling and itchiness.” She explains. “I’m going to check your heart beat now.”

Her cool stethoscope touches his chest and he takes a deep breath in before coughing violently. Each time he shakes, his ribs throb. 

“Hey, hey, you’re okay. Just try to relax, okay? Here, drink some water?”

Dream manages to get the drink down, his coughing fit finally settling.

“How are you doing? I heard your mom was telling you about your injuries. Do you have any questions?”

“George,” Dream mumbles, his voice scratchy.

“George?” Nurse Emily asks, looking at his mom.

“He stepped out for a bit, he’ll be back.” His mom responds.

Dream feels an ache in his body that nearly drags him unconscious again. The only thing keeping him up is the prospect of George coming back.

“Here, this is the remote to control the bed and call for a nurse,” Nurse Emily presses a hefty remote into his hand. “You can also request painkillers, but it will limit you if you press it too much.”

“Okay,” Dream nods slightly, trying not to jar his neck.

The nurse leaves the room and Dream shifts his attention to his distraught mother.

“Are you okay?” Dream rasps, his head still dazed.

“Yes, yeah I am. I’m okay, Clay. I should be the one asking you that,” she sniffles before wiping her nose.

“‘M good. Tired.” He responds. 

“Then sleep. I’ll be here.”

\----------------------------------

The next time he stirs, he hears a light voice beside him. Two of them. He looks to his side to see Drista and Mom sitting and talking, lightly laughing. Not enough for a real humorous joke, but just enough to ease tension.

“Hey there,” Dream mumbles.

“Clay!” Drista chirps, standing up and rushing to his side.

“What’s up little bird?”

“Nothing much, just glad you’re alive.” She says with a soft smile.

“How long have I been here?” Dream asks.

“Just over a day now,” His mom answers. “You’ve been in this room for about twelve hours now.”

“Where’s George?” His voice is hopeful.

“He went to your house to feed Patches,” Drista says. “He said to say hi for him.”

“He was here all night I think,” his mom notes. “He seemed really quiet, even for him.”

“Okay,” Dream sighs.

They make small talk before a wave of pain hits Dream, pulling him back under to the realm of unconsciousness.

\--------------------------

The next time he wakes, he looks over and sees George again. This time awake. George sees Dream’s eyes open and turns to leave again.

“Wait,” Dream slurs, his mouth heavy with exhaustion. “Please.”

He says nothing but Dream is determined to get his attention.

“George, please, stay for a moment, just stay for a while.” He says in a half-singing voice.

“You remember that song?” George asks, pausing.

“Yeah, I do.” 

“It was just a media-share song, why do you remember it?”

“I could ask the same thing.”

George turns back around, facing Dream.

“What’s wrong? You’ve been here all the time that I’m unconscious but the moment I wake up, you leave.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“George, please. I need to know. It’s killing me, not knowing. I feel you when I sleep, I wake up to you. Then you leave me with nothing. No answers, no feelings, no thoughts. Do you have any idea what it’s like to feel abandoned?”

“You think I don’t?” He bitterly remarks. “Last I remember, I was trying to help you calm down and then you stormed off. I didn’t hear anything from you for hours. Then, I got a message from your mom that you were in the fucking hospital? For a car crash! Dream, I was so worried about you. I knew you were blaming yourself for hitting me but now? Now I’m blaming myself. I let you leave. I let you leave the house in a panicked state and look where that got you. I could have stopped you. I should have stopped you! You could have died, Dream. I could have lost you.”

Dream is speechless at the proclamation before George turns around, wiping a tear off his face.

“I’m here for support, but I’m hurting too. I came here to help you. I came here to help you after Katlynn, but I can’t afford to let myself break. I’m trying to stay strong for you. I come here every hour I can but I could never find the courage to face you. Well here I am, here we are. I’m going to rest, I need sleep.”

Dream is left in an empty room, shock radiating through his mind. 

_ It hurts. It really hurts seeing him like that. I want to hug him. Kiss him. Make him feel better. Reassure him. I’m alive. I’ll be okay. I need him. I need him. _

His finger taps rapidly, unable to keep up with his mind. He feels a sluggish material seep into his veins, leeching away the pain. He looks down and sees that he’s been tapping the pain killer button. Deciding it’s better than nothing, he continues pressing it. 

_ They put a limit on it, I’ll be fine. I just need to sleep. I need to get out of here. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I am in no way a medical professional. Honestly I have no idea what kind of injuries Dream would have from a car crash and I also have no idea what would have been done to treat him.


	13. Stitches

He phases in and out of consciousness for the next few days. The pain, guilt, and heartache take a toll. He grows thinner and his eyes are dull. The hospital keeps him alive but his recovery time is elongated. By the fourth day, he’s still completely stationary in bed. A physical therapist comes by every day to stretch his limbs, but Dream doesn’t feel any kind of rush to get better.

\-------------

“Mom,” he asks. “what day is it?

“It’s the 19th of August. Why?”

Dream closes his eyes in pain. Not physical pain though. 

“George’s flight is set for today. He’s leaving.”

His mom takes his hand in here before speaking. 

“Honey, he’s still here. He’s been taking care of Patches for you. He canceled his flight.”

“And he still won't fucking face me.” Dream mutters. 

“Try to see it from his point of view, Clay. Trust me I know. When I first walked in here… I cried. I cried so hard seeing my baby wrapped up in tubes and bandages. I thought I was going to lose you.”

“But you're still here. And you never talk to me like this. Calling me your baby? Where was that when I was depressed in middle school? Or when you called the cops on me?”

“I wasn’t a good parent… Clay.” She mumbles, her gaze downcast. “I focused so much on trying to get you to be successful, I forgot about the emotional side. Then you flourished when you moved out and I realized… you didn’t need a teacher. You needed a mother."

“Damn right I did,” Clay sighs. “I won’t forgive you for that. I love you but I can’t forget feeling the blood on my wrists in 7th grade.”

“I’m sorry, Clay. My apology doesn’t have to mean anything to you. I just want you to know I am here if you want me here.”

“I love you too, Mom.” He pauses for a few moments before asking a question. “Do you feel guilt? For what happened?”

“A bit, yes. I asked you if you were okay to drive home but you seemed shaken up still. Then you said yes and I told myself you can handle driving home.”

She starts to cry, wiping her tears away with her hand. 

“I told myself that I shouldn’t try to mother you after years of not being there. I love you, Clay. I’m trying to stay strong for you, though. And I’m sure George will too.”

“He talked to me, a few days ago. He said he hurt too and wanted to stay strong so he left. That seeing me hurt him so much he couldn't be in here.” Dream starts to cry as well, realizing how badly he fucked up.

_ I’m an asshole. I’m such a fucking asshole. The accident wasn’t my fault… but the way I’ve treated him is. I’ve thrown my emotional ass all over him. I’ve probably overwhelmed him, too. Not to mention I actually, physically hurt him. He was at my house for less than 48 hours and about a third of that was me crying. Me being weak. Me just sobbing on him. I didn’t even stop to ask how he was doing. I didn’t even think to consider his thoughts. I was just so happy to see him. I’m too fucked up to be with him though. Platonically, romantically, anything. I’m probably causing him more pain than ever. I guess my childhood fucked me up for the long run in terms of relationships. _

“He said he would try to come talk to you soon.” His mom says. “He’s a good man. I can see why you like him. He’s doing his best to take care of himself so he can help you.”

_ He’s not my therapist he shouldn’t have to feel like my therapist I’m throwing all this shit on him he’s my fucking best friend not a doctor. Why did I ask him for this kind of help that isn’t right that’s fucking toxic of me if I demand him to help me without thinking about him maybe this is why Katlynn decided to just take me. Because I wasn’t good enough. I wasn’t good enough of a boyfriend so she decided to just take matters into her own hand and tell me that. I deserved it. I fucking got what I deserved there’s no reason for me to cry like a sore loser. Maybe I should’ve just done it. That would’ve stopped any of this from happening. If I had just pushed deeper, I wouldn’t of ever met George. I wouldn’t of met Katlynn. None of this would’ve happened. I caused this.  _

“Clay, you need to calm down. Your heart rate is spiking,” His mom tries to snap him out of his panic.

“I hurt him, I really really hurt him,” Dream murmurs through his ragged breathing. “I hurt George more than just hitting him I’m so fucking stupid I can’t believe it.”

“Clay, listen to me,” She firmly says, resting her hand on Dream’s.

She misses though, and touches his wrist.

Dream yanks his arm away from her in a panic before gritting his teeth in pain from his collarbone moving. He feels the bed rise up, allowing him to sit straight up. His chest is burning from the lack of oxygen and the strain of his heart.

“I deserved it.”

“What? Clay, no, no you didn’t. Listen to me.”

“Is everything ok?” A nurse pops his head into the room, hearing the commotion.

“I should’ve died.” He murmurs. “Why did I live? After everything I’ve done?”

“He’s having a panic attack I think,” His mom says frantically. “I’ve never seen him have one, I’m not sure what to do.”

“Clay, hey, Clay?” The nurse steps in. “Can you look at me?”

He manages to lift his head, still shaking.

“My name is Freddy, I’m a nurse here at the Orlando Mass General Hospital. You’re safe. Here, hold this,” The nurse reaches into his pocket and takes out a stress ball. “Squeeze it and tell me, do you have any pets?”

Dream squeezes the ball, his fist trembling. His wrist burns with the effort, but the pain acts as a lifeline. A tie to reality.

“I- I have a cat. Patches.” 

“Good, I have a cat too. His name is Waffle. My sister named him,” Freddy chuckles. “What is your name?”

“Clay.”

“What’s your birthday?”

“‘Gust 12, 1999.”

“Cool, my birthday is July 19. Can you tell me your favorite color?”

“Green.”

“I’m more of a purple guy myself, but green is a really pretty color,” He smiles, trying to keep Dream’s focus on him. “What about a song you have stuck in your head? Got any new earworms?”

“Uh, I think it’s called… fuck…” Dream mumbles, trying to remember.

“It’s okay if you can’t remember it right now, if you want, I have my phone. We can listen to music.”

“Okay.”

“Do you like Glass Animals?”

Dream nods mindlessly, not sure who that is off the top of his head, as Freddy opens his music app.

“Okay, what do you do in your free time?”

“I play video games.”

“Ohhh nice. I’m a little bit of a gamer myself, what do you play?”

“Minecraft.”

“Nice, I like Minecraft too. Do you have a favorite game? Like bedwars? Or are you more of a parkour or survivalist? Builder maybe?”

“I’m a speedrunner, I like beating the game.” Dream responds, focusing on his words. “I like parkour too.” His sentences are simple, words just barely slurred.

“I wish I could do that, I’ve tried parkour before and I’m no good,” he laughs. “Got any siblings?”

“One, little sister. I call her little bird.”

“Aw that’s sweet, I have an older brother. He calls me stinker,” He chuckles. “How are we feeling?”

“Better.”

It’s odd though, how Freddy calmed him down. George did his best through physical touch and soothing words, but Freddy didn’t even attempt to touch him. All he did was ask questions about everything unrelated. His breathing is slower, more manageable.

“Do you want something to drink? We have water, apple juice, ice even?”

“Water, please.”

“Gotcha, I’ll be right back, okay? Keep playing with that stress ball, will ya?”

Dream looks to his side to see that his mom had stepped out during that. He didn’t even notice. 

_ I didn’t even know she left. She was doing her best but then I just forgot about her. How could I? _

He tries to kick the thought out of his head, not wanting to slip back into panic. 

_ I wonder when George is going to be back. I need to apologize. I need to right this. I need to not be such a fuck up. I need to see him. I need him. _

He thinks about getting his phone then remembers that it probably broke in the crash.

“Here you go,” Freddy alerts his presence. “Got some water and a straw because you need to try and not move your neck much.”

“Thanks.”

“You’re very welcome, Clay.” He smiles. “Do you want me to stay? We can keep talking if you want to get your mind off things.”

“Okay, yeah, that would be nice.” Dream nods, allowing Freddy to bring the straw to his mouth.

\--------------------

“My shift is almost over, I have to go finish cleaning some stuff in the backroom.” Freddy says, checking his watch. “It was nice getting to know you, though. You feeling good? We can get some sleep aids if you need too.”

“I think I’m good, thank you, Freddy.”

“Any time, Clay. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Dream nods as Freddy leaves. As he leaves, his mom enters.

“Hey, Clay, I’m sorry I left earlier. I figured you would want me to get someone, so, here.”

George steps in behind her, towering over her short stature. He looks nervous, guilty, hurt. 

Dream’s heart cracks as he sees the uneasiness in George’s eyes.

_ I really fucked up didn’t I. _

“Hi George,” Dream says, his mouth dry.

“Hey Dream, how are you doing?”

His mom once again leaves the room, letting George sit by Dream’s bed.

“I’m okay, I had a panic attack. It’s scary as hell.” Dream responds.

“Oh, I’m sorry I wasn’t there to help.”

“It’s okay, you’re not obligated to calm me down every time.” Dream says before taking a deep breath and preparing to spit out his apology.

“I’m sorry,” George cuts him off. “I’m sorry about the last thing I said. I really am. I shouldn’t have gone that far. I could have worded it better. I’m sorry I hurt you.”

“George,” Dream takes his hand, grabbing his attention.

In such a short amount of time, they’ve developed a special language. Hands. The gentle touch of one is enough to drag each other to reality. They’re used to typing or mumbling their words in hushed voices over Discord at early hours of the morning, but touch means something else. A promise to each other that they’re real. That they won’t leave.

“It’s okay, I’m sorry too. I didn’t stop to consider your thoughts. You’re my best friend and I don’t want to lose you. You’re not a therapist and you shouldn’t have to feel like one.”

George nods before talking, his voice cracking.

“I just… seeing someone I love in the hospital… it’s really bad. It really really fucking hurts, Dream. I- I watched my friend die. When I was in middle school.” He says, choking on his words. “I, we were best friends. And one day, I was brought to the hospital and I saw him. He was bandaged and… he had tubes. He had so many tubes. He had a nurse monitoring him every minute. It was so scary, and then one moment… his heart just stopped. That was just…” He trails off, tears falling faster.

“George… I’m sorry…”

“It’s not your fault, Dream. I didn’t tell you about him. I don’t tell a lot of things, actually. I have a habit of keeping secrets ever since he died. I didn’t think I would ever have a friendship last long enough to mean something more than he did.”

“Do you trust me though? You didn’t have to tell me that if you didn’t want to. I would never force you to tell your secrets, you know that right?”

“I- Dream. You’re so blind sometimes and I’m the colorblind one.” he scoffs gently. “I… I don’t trust you. It’s more than that. I don’t know a word for it though. Trust is… not enough. To say what I think of you. I… you… you are the person I want to know for eternity. I want to… I want to hear your voice every day. I want to tell you my secrets, I want to invite you into my life, I want to see you grow. I want you to know every nook and cranny of my mind, I want you to know everything about me. It goes so much deeper than trust, Dream.” His breathing is shaky, interjecting each word with uncertainty.

Dream is shell-shocked. Speechless. His mind can’t keep up with the information he was just given. His shattered heart is getting stitched back together, piece by piece, word by word. 

“I- I love you. Dream. I really do. And… I didn’t want to tell you like this. I didn’t want to tell you on a hospital bed while I’m here, less than a week after hearing you got…. Yeah. I didn’t think it was a good time.”

Dream still is shocked in silence, unable to form words.

“Are you going to say anything?” George mutters. “I just poured my heart out to you and you’re silent?”

“George… I, I think I love you too.” Dream whispers. “But… I don’t know how to love someone like that. I… I’ve been saying I love you for years now. But never let myself think romantically. After Katlynn… I don’t know what love like that means. She said she loved me and I believed her… but I don’t think she did.”

“It’s okay, I understand.” George nods.

“I’m not rejecting you, George. I want you to know that.” Dream says hurriedly. “I’ve actually dreamed of confessing my feelings… but… they always end in me dying.”

It’s George’s turn to sit there, silent. They stare at their hands for a few moments, both trying to gather thoughts.

“Would you mind… trying? Like, we just take it slow. Really slow? And I’ll do my best to love you?” Dream asks. 

“Yeah, that sounds good. And I’ll help you the best I can.”

“I don’t want you getting hurt, though. And last time you tried to help me, you definitely got hurt.”

“It’s okay, Dream. Really. My side doesn’t hurt anymore.”

“I’m also talking about what you said. You can’t just make that kind of stuff up you know.”

“I was unstable. I was tired and confused and upset that I could’ve lost you. I’m sorry. I just want to be whole so I can help you get whole too. But that’s not an excuse for what I said.”

“Thank you, so fucking much George. Thank you.” Dream squeezes his hand to compensate for a hug.

George smiles softly, bringing Dream’s hand to his lips once more in a comforting kiss.


	14. Alive

The days melt away as he recovers. George nearly lives at the hospital now, only ever returning to Dream’s house to take care of the cat. Also, ubering to the hospital is not exactly cheap and Dream’s Mom still has work. 

Twitter is extremely worried since Dream hasn't been online in over a week (the longest he’s been off Twitter was about three days) and George is barely active. The other members of the SMP have donations bombarding them every hour asking about the missing pair. 

Only one streamer knows of their situation; Sapnap. He’s decided to take a break from the internet until his best friends are back online to prevent any misunderstandings. 

In the safety of the hospital, Dream feels much better. He spends all day talking to George and even on call with Sapnap, just like old times. He hasn't been on a computer or phone since that day in the Walmart parking lot.

He suffered a pretty serious concussion. The doctor said he was lucky to not have any memory loss. 

As Dream heals physically, his mental health also improves. His mom called a therapist who comes twice a week. Little by little, piece by piece, weight falls off his shoulders. And he’s freer. 

\-----------------

“Are you ready, Dream?” George asks, gripping his hand in excitement. “You’re going home today. “

Dream smiles and nods before his face falls. 

“You've been here for like four weeks now while I recover. You have to go home too sometime, right?”

“Yeah…” George nods. “but I think I can stay for a bit longer because I’m also listed as your caretaker.”

“I’m sorry you’re still here. You probably want to go home and see your cat.” 

“Yeah I do miss him, but I also enjoy being here with you.” George grins before bringing Dream’s hand to his lips and pressing a gentle kiss to it.

A light pink tint graces Dream’s cheeks as he feels the unconditional love pour out of George in such a small motion. 

He won’t lie, it’s scary being with George sometimes. For the majority of their friendship, Dream was the emotional one. He would say “I love you” the most and openly show his affection for his friends while George would show his in more minute ways. Since they revealed their feelings, though, it’s been flipped. 

Dream’s trauma damaged his view of romantic love, but it didn’t change how he feels around George. Each time the British man does something small, Dream feels his heart ache with an unknown feeling. It burns but feels perfect. Each step has been filled with flaming hot coals, but the knowledge of George’s true intentions smother the heat just enough for Dream to continue.

“I’m thinking about moving here actually.” George says suddenly. “I know we planned on moving in together with Sapnap sometime in the future, but I want that sometime to come sooner.”

Dream grins before grimacing from the sudden movement. 

“I would love that, but I am even more ready to get this neck brace off.” He scoffs.

“I think they’re taking that off today but you’ll be stuck in a sling thing.”

As if on cue, the doctor comes in with a nurse. It’s Freddy.

“Hey Clay,” Freddy smiles. “You ready to get out of this joint?”

“Hell yeah,” Dream chuckles.

The doctor talks through the motions while Freddy helps disconnect tubes and rifles through paperwork.

“Do you have any questions?” Freddy asks.

“How long do you think until this finger heals?” Dream asks and George chuckles.

“You break almost half your body and your first priority is gaming,” George comments.

“Your finger should be mostly healed by now, but it won’t be full strength for a few months. I would recommend staying away from the speedruns and bedwars until your physical therapist gives you the go ahead,” Freddy laughs. “Your collarbone is looking good too, but you will have to keep it mostly immobilized for another 5 weeks. After your last xray, we decided to keep your neck brace on just a little longer to support your head and take the weight off your collarbone. You’ll get an email with some scheduling options for removing the casts and stuff since you have such a variety.

I would also recommend staying away from the internet for a while. Your concussion cleared up completely a few months ago, but your therapist has some notes about social media.” Freddy flips a few pages before reading aloud. “ _ Keep social media usage to around 2-3 hours a day and restrict anything that can cause stress _ .”

“Sounds good,” Dream nods.

“We’ll get the bill sorted out and sent to your billing address, but other than that, you are free to go. Do you want your bag of clothes you came with?” Freddy asks.

“I think I’m good with leaving it,” Dream says. “They’re probably bloodstained and stuff.”

“Here,” Freddy says before handing his wallet over. “You definitely don’t want to leave that.”

“How did this thing survive?” Dream chuckles.

“I dunno, but now you’re all set.”

“Thank you so much Freddy,” Dream grins. “Also, could you please request an itemized bill?”

“Of course, and I’ll grab a wheelchair for you. Do you have a wheelchair at home?”

“No, I don’t.” Dream shakes his head.

“You should head over to CVS or Walmart and grab a wheelchair first thing then.” Freddy suggests before leaving the room.

“Can you call my mom?” Dream asks George. “You can’t exactly drive us home.”

“You’re right,” George chuckles. “You Americans and your backwards roads.”

“Oh hush,” Dream laughs. “Your roads are the ones that are backwards.”

They quietly bicker with mirth pouring out of their voices until Freddy returns with a wheelchair. 

They carefully transfer Dream to the chair before George starts rolling them down the hall. He hands Dream his phone to call his Mom.

“Hey Mom.” Dream starts. “They’re letting me out right now. Can you meet us at the hospital?”

His mom sounds like she’s crying tears of joy as she agrees.

“You ready to see Patches?” George asks, taking his phone back. “She really missed you. But I will say she’s finally warming up to me.”

“Yeah, she’s a little princess who decides who she likes. I’m kind of surprised she chose you.”

“I almost got clawed when I came to feed her after you hadn’t come home. She was not a happy kitty.”

“Do you think Robert and Patches would get along?” Dream asks.

“I think it would take some time, but yeah. Probably.” George smiles at the thought of them living together with their pets. “Sapnap would make the house a zoo if he brought all his pets.”

“He has three cats and a dog, that would only make the population five cats and a dog. I think that’s manageable.” 

“Just wait until you have to manage multiple litter boxes not to mention Patches may not like the dog.”

“True, she’ll probably either tolerate or warm up to them though.” 

They continue making idle chatter as Dream’s mom pulls into the loading bay area. She jumps out of the car and hugs Dream.

“I’m so glad to see you out of there,” She mumbles.

“I’m glad to be here too,” Dream murmurs, hugging her back.

\-----------------------------------

Time skip 10 weeks

\-----------------------------------

Dream opens his OBS for the first time in months. Months of healing and waiting have led up to this moment. He’s spent a day every week in therapy, another day in physical therapy, and hours upon hours talking to George. Speaking of George, he went home a month ago.

Their relationship hasn't quite blossomed, but it's steadily growing. 

\---------------------

“You made it home well?” Dream asks, slightly unsettled by the echoey emptiness of his house. 

“Yeah, the plane ride was pretty easy. No bad weather. But I am really tired, so I’m going to go lay down.

“Alright, sounds good." Dream says, his heart racing as three words hang off his tongue by a thread of fear. 

“Goodnight Dream, I love you.” A simple statement with no expectations.

“I- I love you too.” Dream chokes out. 

He can hear the grin on George’s face before Dream hangs up. 

He leans back into the couch, tears falling. So many sleepless nights, so many painful moments. All keeping him from loving. But finally, he can say it. He can say it because he knows what it means. 

\-------------------

George is on Discord, so he clicks over and joins a vc. 

“Hey George,” he starts. 

“Hey Dream!” George chirps back. “Are you ready to do this?”

“Yeah,” Dream nods. “It’s been a long and hard 5 months. I think I’m ready.”

“I’ll turn on my face cam and you can when you’re ready?”

“Yeah, that sounds good.” 

Dream sets up his stream, titling it  _ Hey guys _ . 

He goes live and instantly the chat is flooded with welcome messages. He hits 800k viewers within the first few minutes. 

He takes a drink of water to try and calm down before switching his mic on. The stream is currently set to a black screen, so only his voice is playing. 

“Hey chat,” he says quietly. “It’s been a while, hasn't it?”

Questions explode through the chat, moving too fast for Dream to read. He already knows what they’re asking though. 

“So, I wanted to tell you guys what’s been going on. Why I’ve dropped off the face of the Earth. To put it simply, I needed a break. The real answer is much more complex, but I won't be sharing it all. I value transparency but this is something I believe would be better to keep private. 

So first, regarding the leaked image of my face, that was done out of spite. I will not confirm who did it but it was not consensual. That’s probably old news by now though. I think it got taken down fairly early, though, so please do not circulate the image.

I’m also joined today by George for the next announcement.”

“Hello!” George adds as Dream takes a deep breath to prepare for his next statement.

His body buzzes with fear and anticipation. Telling the world what happened is a frightening thing, but facing the world is even harder.

“5 months ago, I was involved in a car crash. It really did a number on me, so I decided to put off content for a while. It killed me not being able to release videos, but I was overdue for a vacation. And that brings us to where I am today.”

He drags the Discord call into the stream, letting them see George who is waving. 

Dream takes a deep breath before turning on his camera. 

He looks at the lens, at chat, and smiles. He sees his face on the OBS screen. His clean skin, free of bruises. His eyes, lighter than they once were. His grin is hesitant but wide. He slowly waves to the camera, looking directly into the blinking blue light. 

“Hey everyone, it’s me. Dream. And… I’m alive.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a rollercoaster to write and I couldn't be more thankful for all the support! Please consider supporting my journey as a Twitch streamer as well! My username on every platform is GhostFox667! I stream Minecraft and Just Chatting mostly and we have a super supportive and accepting community! If you go to my Instagram, there's a link in the bio that will take you to my YouTube, Discord, Tik Tok, Twitch, etc!
> 
> I can't wait to share what I have written next! Tysm everyone! :D


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